Nothing Like Us

There's a certain point in your life when you realise that there is no turning back. You can no longer return to the way things once were. A crossroads where the life you once knew and the life ahead of you turn sharply in opposite directions. That day, everything spins madly out of control. 

"For fuck sake Alexa, I'm fed up with your bullshit!" I turned around to meet my fiancé's angry gaze. I couldn't help but to ask myself what went wrong, what had I done to destroy our relationship. 

"Don't you dare blame this on me, you're the one who can't keep it in your pants. Yeah, you heard me. People around here talk Chris, I know exactly what you get up to when you leave me to take care of everything so don't even try to deny it" The words left my mouth before I could even stop myself. I wasn't sure if I was happy that the truth had finally come out and we'd stopped brushing it under the carpet acting like everything was normal, when in actual fact it was quite the opposite. It wasn't normal for a woman to feel lonely when she was engaged, it wasn't normal for her fiancé to leave early hours in the morning when he thought she was asleep, it wasn't normal for a couple to ignore each other and it defiantly wasn't normal for an engaged couple not to love each other. Which is why we were having this conversation, because somehow, somewhere down the line we forgot how we felt about one another We could try to rebuild our relationship but I don't think either of us had it in us any more. I had become tired with the way things were and I guess I had been pushing him further and further away. Which made me wonder, was it all my fault? 

"Look, I know what I di‒what I've been doing isn't right but our relationship was dead long before." He replied sighing before adding "I never thought it would end this way Alexa. I mean, at one time it used to be us against the world.. I just don't feel the same way any more. I wish I did... I really do."

My back hit the wall as I sank to the floor trying to process the conversation, I could see Chris sinking down next to me in the corner of my eye. He wrapped his arm around me, essentially pulling me close and allowing me to curl up to him feeling his body heat. It didn't take me long to give in and lay my head on his chest. We stayed like that for about an hour before my mobile rang, I was trying to debate whether to move or just savour the moment as I knew it would probably be the last time we would have any moments of intimacy or feel this close while also being further apart than ever.

"Want me to get it?" Chris asked, looking over at the phone that was still ringing much to my disgust.

"Please." I replied not really having the energy to get it myself. Chris kissed my forehead before getting up and walking over to the phone. I listened to his voice as he spoke to the caller. His voice was raspy as if he had a cold, I suspected it had something to do with the fact we had just sat in silence for the last hour.

"It's Megan." Chris called from the kitchen.

"Tell her I'm on my way." I replied before standing up and heading into our bedroom to get my ankle boots.