The Groom's Past

Chapter 7

Early Morning, New Year’s Day

“I seen the way you were looking at her, looking her up and down and around. I’m not that stupid Alex.” I shouted in his face. I remember being afraid that day thinking about all the different outcomes and what my life would be without Alex in it. I had to wait all day to talk to him, because he went to the dentist early that school morning.

“I wasn't looking at her. You are all that I look at.”

“Bullshit. Don’t feed these lies to me!”

Alex was on his knees by now, pleading and begging, I wasn’t even listening. Then he looked me in the eyes with his blue vibrant eyes. I knew it wasn’t going to work this time on me. I wasn’t that stupid.

“Leave me alone.” I whispered in the cold air. The heat of my breath made waves across the sky. Then I left, Alex, the school driving off in the middle of the day..

I should have know after two months of dating that this wasn’t going to work, but I had already fallen to hard where it was to hard to fall back out of it--this was a problem I’ve always had. I am still trying to figure out how to fall out of love, after the years past that we’ve dated. It’s kinda like your old teddy bear that you loved as a little kid, every time you look at your dear teddy bear you think of all the memories that it brings you, and that's how I feel about Alex.

I pulled over and cried and cried until I felt like my body couldn’t  drain out any more tears. I remember shaking as I drove, I swerved into the opposite and quickly moving back into the correct lane then back and forth all the way until I got to my house.

“Why are you home so early?” My Mom said, I ignored her, hearing the sound of her running into something, trying to run after me. Ops, clumsy Mother, I remember thinking.

I check my watch, it was twelve, three hours before I was suppose to get out of school. “Yeah, what’s your point?” I asked, slightly mumbling, indicating there was something that happened. I ran into the bathroom before she could respond.

Water dripped down into the tube. I pulled off my clothes and jump in. My head soothed me with its great mental music and I laid my head back in relaxation. The best destresser ever.

A low thumping noise hit the bathroom door, instantly awaking me from my relaxation oasis.

“What do you want?” I screamed already knowing it was my Mom. Maybe I should have been nicer to her when I could. But I never understood her depression phases. I still blame myself that I was part of her problem.

“Alex is here to see you. He said it was important.” I could hear in her voice, the nice tone, she was trying as best as she could to be nice, to hide her depression under fake smiles and home cooked meals. I felt her meals said, “don't worry I’m fine, if I can make dinner then I’m fine.” But I knew she wasn’t.

I stumbled, in the most clumsy way ever--knocking down soap and shampoo bottles, while even hitting my foot on the tube’s faucet. Grabbing a towel and messily wiping my wet self down, I said, “Did he tell you why he wanted to talk to me?”

Through the door I could hear her making a tsk tsk noise. “No he just said it’s urgent.” I knew by her voice she was lying, she wasn’t in the mood to give a pep talk to her daughter.

The ponytail on my head was, not perfect--bumps in my hair that indicated a not so sleek pony--it was perfect. The reason why I wanted to look like a mess was one thing. Alex. I wanted him to see what a mess he has made.

I peeked my head out the bathroom door,  just in case. Then lifting my chin up high and headed into the living room. “So you wanted to talk to me?” I said, sitting down on the couch across from him.

“Yeah, I mean that’s the only reason why I’m here. For you.” He flashed that familiar bright white smile. That smile that brings warmth to my heart and feelings to my soul. Right then I wanted to get wrapped up in his embrace and feel the heat we make when our lips lock.

But I have to stay strong, determined, in order to get what I wanted.

Then with his eyes he gave me a deep intense, sincere look. His eyes were the Winter Wonder Land, icy, cool and also hot. “I love you.” Alex whispered leaning in. ”I could say that a-”

“What hold on.” I paused looking at him. “MOM, I KNOW YOU’RE LISTENING!”

Seconds later I seen my Mom peaked out of the hallway. “Sorry I was just waiting so I could get a drink.”

I rolled my eyes, listening to the swoosh swoosh of the water. Then the bang of the glass cup hitting the sink.

There was silence as we waited for her to leave. “Sorry, sorry,” Mom said, holding her hand like she was stopping some invisible force I couldn’t see. “I’m done. Go back to your guys chit-chat.”

We waited to hear the slam of the bedroom door shut, and it did. We looked up at each other and our eyes looked and I felt connected to Alex. I had chills running everywhere--up, down, side-to-side--it was something hard to explain, but everyone that has really feel for someone would understand. I guess it was like slamming into a hard wall several times and everytime you hit it, you didn’t feel hurt you just felt love running everywhere throughout your body.

I didn’t realise it but now, Alex moved to my couch I was sitting on, still with his intense stare. And I felt us both, like the some person, moving closer than as our lips began to touch, everything seemed to be gone and disappear, like we were the only ones here on Earth. It was a long time since we’ve had an intense kiss like that this one.

Hand moving like hand do. Hearts beating like hearts do. Lips moving like lips do.

We didn’t do it. If that what you think. No it was just a kiss, an intense kiss. Okay it was more like making out but it still was  considered a kiss, maybe not so innocent but it was still a kiss.

We sat there on the couch cuddling on that cold Winter day. Watching a movie I can’t remember at this moment.  But it was just a relaxing Winter night.

A/N: I know its been a while since I updated but sometimes I just don't have the spirit to write GP, but I do want to finish it cause I like how I'm going to end it. I'm either going to make it 20 chapter or a little less than that. so I'm still trying to firgue how everything is going to work out. So stay tuned!

-MsFoodAddicted