Hanabe (Short Story)

Cold

"H-How long did you know for?" his voice cracks slightly, shocking me.

He looks like he's filled with guilt. A part of me feels sorry for him.
I answer honestly, "About 3 months."

He inhales sharply.

My gaze wanders above his head. I notice that we're standing under my classroom. I can see my desk next to the window. And behind it...

Kanato has his cheek resting in his palm, staring right at me. He doesn't look away.

"3 months?" Aki chokes out and I focus on him again instead of Kanato's sea-green eyes.
I manage a small smile. A smile of pity.
"Thank you for all your effort. I enjoyed my time with you. Please don't do this again though. You might just crush the next girl," I say stiffly.
He stutters, "N-no! I'm not that kind of- I mean I didn't- the guys just-"
I shake my head and continue smiling with my lips together.
"I really don't care about your excuses," I say, cutting him off. I can feel the coldness spreading from the inside. "Just go inside."

He stares at me at me in shock.
I can feel the icy Darkness inside me spreading. It will not be long now. I know I cannot stop it so I don't even try this time. Aki seems to sense the change in my usual bubbly self because he bids and walks past me.

And it takes over.

I feel like I have shut down. My mind is blank. I feel like an empty shell. Yet my bones feel like jelly. I know my expression is blank and cold, my happy shine gone. I remember Kanato and look up. He is still sitting at his desk. Watching. He looks a little shocked though. I feel bad. I probably do not look so appealing right now. I hate that he saw me change like this. My spark is gone. I know it has. Because this has happened before. I look away and walk towards the doors.