An Indescribable Type of Gorgeous

Dreaming in the Morning

To my fear, last night I had the same dream- but a different variation. It was about you. You, with your smooth, nostalgic voice; you, with your teasing eyes and the devil's curves that cut off the flow of oxygen to my brain.

Every morning- including this morning- I bury my head in the familiar scent of my pillow and inhale; then I scream. Every single night, you are there taunting me, and you dare to move in your prowling manner, seducing me with the touch of your hands. Those damn hands; with your nails painted black and chipping off leadenly. I remember last night I was staring at those nails, and wondering who chipped them, and if every time they chipped it hurt and peeled away bits of your sanity.

Maybe I need to stop focusing on your hands. But then what- your eyes? Those kaleidoscope deviants that even Lennon would be astounded by? Those intoxicating blue waves rich in desire?

I read online somewhere, that if someone loves you their pupils tend to dilate in your presence. It's a way to see more, to take in image after image of what they crave. So why are your eyes dilating when you see me? How can you even dare to do that when five minutes ago you tore apart my last bit of hope? Hell, in my dreams I might as well be on crack. I too want to take in more and more of your essence while I'm certain you love me- every other moment I'm terrified you don't.

So last night, you were in my dream. Last night, you and I sat next to each other, and we were surrounded by our friends, laughing and savoring the last moments of this simulation unknowingly. You put your hand on mine. Normally, I would of done something stupid- I would of probably insulted you or pulled away or even asked you, what the hell was that? But instead, my mood was calm, I left my hand there and for a single moment, you and I both sat in peace. All of the hesitation and what-ifs melted away like the sun melted into the setting sky. You, too, were blending in with the scenery, a million colors of deep purple and pink drowning out the world. You and I, finally on the same page. Me, being able to admit that I, I am falling for you.

Then I woke up.