Chicken Soup for the Horny Teenager's Soul

Story #1: The 70-year old Smoker

It was in Janurary. The 2nd semester of my freshman year in High School and let me tell you, I was a dumb hoe. So there was this guy a liked cause ya know hahaha typical teenage emotions. So yea, I really liked him and because I did, my dumb self thought it would work best if I try to act all sexy n shit to get him to like me. He was high key a man whore so I had no doubt he was gonna say yes to a quick hook up (not sex fyi). So one day I decided to dress up super hot to see if he would notice and he actually did lmao. We have 7th period together so he came up to me then and asked me to stay after school. My dumbass said yes and after school we went to the infamous little area behind a staircase where lots of people go to hookup. After making out for a bit he literally whipped his dick out and I was like "um ok...". He was like "suck it" and because I didn't have the guts or common sense to say no, I did it. So I started going at it AND THIS MF HAD THE AUDACITY TO PUSH MY HEAD ALL THE WAY DOWN HIS 8 INCH DICK. (Yes he was a freshman with an 8 inch dick he was blessed). So after almost throwing up we just made out for a while and then went home. The next day bruh....the next mf day.....my throat hurt like a bitch. I obviously couldn't hide my voice from my parents so they took me to the doctor's and the doctor just told me it was because I breathe through my mouth a lot so I breathed in a lot of "bacteria" at school and it messed up my throat. Yeah man I have no idea. So the next day I went to school and my voice was even worse. I literally sounded like a robot. I went to go say hi to my friend group and one of my friend's literally said "girl I told you that sucking dick was gonna turn you into a 70-year old smoker". So yeah, that was actually my nickname for a while until it died down. So my lesson for you kids is to never suck dick unless you 100000% trust the guy to be gentle OR, you have like no gag reflex.

*author's note*
Drink some hot tea with honey and lemon and also CHILL