The Big Baby Theory (A TBBT Fanfiction)- By: Riley Rivers

My Penny

Oh, how I love my Penny! She is my wife you know. Everyday I kiss her, make out with her or cater to her every need. The day we got married, we got into a little rough patch. I carried her over the threshold barely, and I think I felt my back pop.
"Almost there my love!" I recall saying to her breathlessly as I then sat her on the bed. "Ahh! Whew! You are quite heavy dear!" I said kissing her. Then she asked me something about Priya when I blurted it out making out with her...

"Aw, come on! It was a long time ago can we forget it?" I asked her.

"You still did it!" She spat back.

"Ummm, how 'bout this? Why don't we dim the lights, get naked, and make a baby?" She gave me a look when I asked her that. "Just trying to lighten the mood. It's not easy you try it..."

"All right, I'm done." She put her hands up in front of me in a "yuck" gesture.

"Penny, Penny look I'm sorry..."

"You're sorry?" Penny asked me.

"Yes, please come back..." I begged her, looking very sad.

"Come here you bastard!" She said playfully, and I chuckled. We went in that room and made out on the bed.

"Wanna go home, so we can have sex?" I asked her.

"Umm, what about Sheldon he's there..."

"Oh damn it, I forgot! They got into an argument again... Well that limits that option unless..."

"No." Sheldon said crossing his arms.

"No? What do you mean no?!" I asked.

"Leonard for the 3rd time I'm not going to stay over there. That's where Amy was and I can't deal with that..." He hides his face with his hand.

"Ok. Let me sum this up for you, Please give me some privacy..." I explain to him.

"Oh Good Lord, please don't tell me you to are engaging in coitus again..." He puts his hand on his face.

"Yep. And you need to leave." I smiled, while Sheldon agreed to our "roommate agreement" which stated that: If one of the roommates is to have sex or sexually like behaviors with a friend, wife, husband, ex-wife/friend/ etc. He or She is supposed to (granted) leave the two in peace. I was glad Penny and I snuck that on there. So in my room we engaged in sex... It was great! I ended up forgetting my protection but who cares, we could always have sex again. Ahh! This was the nerd life, I tell you...