Iplier and Septiceye Spoofs

Dark's Feeling a Little "Salty"

It wasn't a secret that Dark, despite the proper and serious behaviour, had quite the sweet tooth. Needless to say, Dr. Iplier is not very happy with Dark's sugary diet, often having a minor heart attack when he sees Dark's blood pressure (even though he knew the man was a demon).

Neither was it a secret that Anti was, to put it simply, a huge asshole.

...

Dark was someone who followed a strict schedule. He would wake up before any of the other egos at 6:00, make himself one black tea with 7 teaspoons of sugar, and then proceed to work until one of the egos called him down for lunch. Then, he would hold a meeting, eat dinner then continue to work until around 1 am when he would get his usual 5 hours of sleep, sometimes at his desk instead of his bed. Caffeine the most important part of Dark's day, and nobody dared mess with it, knowing they'd have a tired and pissed off demon on their tail. Nobody, except Anti.

...

Anti was not an early riser. Yet, he dragged himself out of the bed at 5:30, quite annoyed that Dark woke up at such ungodly hours and glitched out of the Septiceye Household and into the kitchen in the Iplier Manor. He knew that losing a few hours of sleep was definitely worth it if he saw Dark's face after his plan was complete.

Carefully, he took the large jar labelled 'SUGAR', cringing when he knocked a cup over, barely managing to catch it. Placing the cup back, he then grabbed an identical jar and kept it where the original had been. Snickering, he glitched away to hide in a corner where he could clearly see the results of his prank.

...

Dark woke up in a sour mood. The meeting yesterday was a disaster, with Wil almost shooting Bim because he said that meetings were going to be the death of him. Not to mention that his work was piling up and that he had little to no sleep last night. To say he was looking forward to his early morning dose of caffeine was an understatement.

Grumbling, he stormed down the empty hallways of the manor and into the kitchen. He put the kettle on, tapping his foot impatiently while waiting for the water to boil, and quickly poured it into the cup. He grabbed two jars, labelled 'TEA' and 'SUGAR'. Taking out two tea bags, Dark sighed as the heavenly smell of fresh tea filled the room. His day was finally looking up. Gently, the demon unscrewed the second jar, taking out the small teaspoon inside it. That was when he noticed something odd. The atmosphere felt like it was buzzing, almost as if it was filled with static. But as soon as he felt it, it vanished. The demon shrugged and began scooping in the delicious white powder into his tea.

If Dark had been at full mental capacity, it would have only taken him mere moments to discover and destroy Anti for trying to ruin his day. However, today, Dark was far from his normal self, and he desperately needed caffeine. Everything else could wait.

Breathing deeply, Dark let out a satisfied sigh. Things were finally looking up. All that torture, the pain, the suffering, it was all finally paying off. With one last look at the beautiful rich colour of his tea, he inhaled deeply, allowing the delicious aroma to fill his senses and took a large gulp of the creation that could rival even the most ridiculously flamboyant representations of God himself.

Regret. Immediate regret flooded Dark's senses, as he spat out the tea just as fast as he had drunk it. Coughing, he grasped onto the kitchen counter for balance. Finally regaining his composure, he realised what had annihilated his already unpleasant morning. Salt. Some asshole had replaced the sugar with salt. Well, dead asshole that is. Because Dark would make sure they suffered a fate worse than death, before, well, killing them. And that, was when he noticed. Something foreign invaded his rage-filled senses. Something glitchy.

...

That morning, the Iplier egos woke up to the sound of distant cackling, and the unholy screeching of "ANTI!!!", making their ears bleed.

AN: So that was my first spoof. Hope you guys enjoyed it! Feedback is always welcome ;)