Machines

A robot wrote me a story, and I wrote it back

TRANSFORMER:
You know, I can get used to this shit. I mean, it's not like I didn't know all the way back that we were all going to die, and now we're all dead. I've seen them, and they're still alive and breathing.

You know what I mean?

You know, I can get used to this shit. Maybe it's better up in heaven, but hell -haha, hell- this place is way better than what I had up on 'ol Mother Earth. I actually have a job here, and no requirements! Well, except for being sent to hell. I get to lead Heavers (because they heaved themselves into heaven, "lucky" try-hards and their.. I don't know, good grades? Gold stars?) to their next life, whether it be something like that mangy fuckin' mutt that belonged to my neighbor Jacklyn or the next Woodrow Wilson. Thank god I'm not them, I wouldn't be able to sit through another god damn horrid life cycle.

So, yeah, I'm not doing too bad. I even saw Paul the other day, old pal of mine from 7th grade. Guess the Mormons were spared. Shame. But he stood out, made me hate him a little less, as he didn't believe in a life after death. Guess we were both wrong. Half of the time, from the reckless way he lived each day, it seemed like he didn't even believe in death. I mean, it's not like I didn't know all the way back that we were all going to die, and now we're all dead. I'm sure that surprised Paul. Wasn't much older than I, maybe a few months. I didn't expect to see him at the ripe age of 32 though. I knew he had gone through some shit, so I did the polite thing and didn't ask him how he had, y'know, kicked the Mormon bucket.

Sometimes I get to look up. What I mean by that is, sometimes, if I'm running a productive shift, they let me take the stairs to the observatory. I get to see life up there. Surviving, I guess. Surviving more than I am, I'm sure. Hell, I don't even think I'm breathing. But them? I've seen them, and they're still alive and breathing. Jealous? Well, only once in a while. Then I remember how Kara fucking cheated on me, and then I think, "oh lord, thank you for the punishment! If you just told me I had to stab her 37 times to get here, I would've sought happiness sooner!"

You know what I mean?