8:16 a.m
alone isn't such a bad thing. independence and freedom, how is that so bad? I want to see the world, I want to explore every single possibility. and I want to do it on my own terms.
people are great, independence is better. people worry about themselves first. they disappoint you. it's just better being alone.
10:31 p.m.
dad is awake now. he's mad at me. mad at the world. he's breaking things, breaking trust along with it. I'm mad at the world, too. I'm mad at him.
3:05 a.m.
can't sleep again. I can't stop myself from looking through our old texts, our retired relationship. I close my eyes only to relieve myself from the memory you were ever even there. it doesn't work. I can't sleep.
4:08 a.m.
I've resorted to pictures, now. it's almost like I'm not hearing the screaming that is muffled by my pillows, I'm hearing your laugh. it's like I'm not feeling empty, I'm feeling whole and happy. but it is only temporary. it is not real.
5:47 a.m.
dad is looking for me. I'm squished in the back of a closet and I feel nothing. nothing but fear. I can't cry anymore. I don't feel anything. I'm just scared.
6:14 a.m.
i'm listening to old voice mails you sent me. the sound of your voice calms me. it is, of course, temporary. once the buzz of your laugh wears off, I'm close to no emotions at all. my face remains blank. you always put a smile on my face. you used to. now I'm sitting alone in a closet while quietly muttering your name, wondering mine is still running through your head.
this is a short story. so the chapters will consist of her journal entries each day. the story will unfold with each day she writes so it will be confusing at first. by the way, her name is Quinn.
-em
YOU ARE READING
journals // c.h
Fanfictionin which a series of journal entries written by a recently missing girl is found by the one they're written about.
