Revenge

Playfull Revenge

here i am again sitting in the grass watching the birds  above the tree I smile when I see the older bird give  food to the babies meanwhile  I cogitation

How nice there life it was tahimik na nanamuhay,  walang gulo at walang pinoproblema all my life I just  wish to have a peace and wonderful life

pero di ata dininig  ang ibig ko.. i sigh ito na naman ako, i always self pitying how can i stop myself to wonder about the things thats can never happen! yah,  you want to know why I am like this, " My life is like a shit, I living alone and miserable my life is full of pain, hatred and regrets!. mylife is dump.

i look above to stop falling my tears but to late its already falling , i cry again

why this shit happen to me" i sigh of pain between my sobs and i can't prevent my anger i shouts i dont care if anyone around, I scream in full of hatred  but meanwhile, I thought why I'm crying to see my enemies happy and laughing at my back ? no no, ha ha ha, hindi but

       Did i regrets this kind of shit huh? 

all that i want is to be happy why, 

why that all of people is me, 

why that I can't manage myself to smile even,   single day this is not a life i dream off, "  nanghihina akong umupo sa sahig habang pigil ko. ang aking panghinga at paghikbi I hug myself.

I want to be happy....

that's all I want, I want to forget the past  but  why the past is always hunt me its always reminiscing everytime ... napahikbi ako, at kahit alam kung  wala akong magawa para mabago itong buhay kong puno ng paghihirap but i want, i realy want to change my fucking dumpfounded life if this is my fate, is this then well be it,,.....

But no hinding hindi ko hahayaan na  maging masaya ang mga taong naging dahilan sa mga paghihirap ko?

hinding hindi,,..  I sobs   I lay down in bed and hug myself ,

can someone help me, can some one  " 

no arghhhh I'm not insane, im no more insane hahaha, no I don' t need someone, I don't need them, huhu  * cried*

Deenn  Javier,......   a cold voice got into me.

  ahhh, God!"  that voice no andito siya I felt scared and fear I can't help myself to quiver

no god please help me"  i scream hinawakan ko ang ulo ko sumasakit na naman ito,

deenne"

andyan siya, a andito siya, napalingo- lingo ako,

no imposible patay na siya wala na siya, di na siya pweding bumalik pero ano itong naramdaman ko, i  put my hand in my  head naguguluhan na ako at ramdam ko na namang nagbabadyang umaagos ang luha sa aking mga mata..

Deenne Javier"  napapitlag na naman ako and this time I can' t help myself  to scream

ahhhhh, ahhhhhhh, halos ibagok ko na ang ulo ko sa pader sa sobrang sakit, "ahh god no no no please ahh shit i cant help it, ahh' tigilan mo na ako"  i scream i look  at the reflection   " no no get out of mylife ahh" dahil di ko na makaya, ang mga makikita kung mga bagay  di ko mapigilang ibato ito, sumigaw ako ng sumigaw

Some one pov

"bogss,  crack" yan ang maririnig mo sa loob ng kanyang kwarto

she cried ahh scratch that, she cried then laughing, habang hawak ang ulo nya at pilit pinipigilan ang isang nilalang na ayaw nyang madinig at magparamdam,  natatakot siya,  oo natatakot siya dahil may mga bagay na ayaw niyang mangyari ulit at di dapat na mangyari pa pero hindi, dahil kahit ano pang pigil nya wala syang laban masyadong malakas ito at kaya siyang paikutin sa anumang gusto nito