As she looked over the crowd of peers, she couldn't help but swear at herself for being such an idiot. She had known that she was supposed to be a specific persona, yet she had somehow forgotten which one to be. That was rather bothersome, and rather terrifying at the same time. The girl with stout hair could potentially pay with her life for such a small mess up. Regardless, she had to face her true mess up now.
Wait,
no she didn't. That wasn't true. She could still redeem herself. While the whispers and gossip circled around the classroom Arashi's posture soon crumbled. Her eyes watered with fake tears, her knees buckled, and finally her arms fidgeted around her. The girl whom was trained to act, to be someone else, could easily see the other's faces twist with concern--they began to disapprove of their own sayings. Arashi had to bite her tongue to keep a smile from appearing upon her features.
The introduction seemed to drag forever, didn't help the Teacher made the entire class apologize for making her cry in front of them. Soon enough, at long last, she was shown to her seat. She could chose from two different ones, one near the middle, or one at the far back near the windowseat. Her mind wanted to go over to the seat to the window----so she went to the one in the middle. One thing Arashi had learned was to not trust her 'real self' but rather trust the persona that was given to her. Snapping out of her thoughts she shakily made her way to the seat, and promptly sat down in it. Her book bag that was previously upon her shoulder slung down from her arm smoothly, before landing upon the ground. Eyes of chocolate flicked back and forth, from the teacher, to the students around her. Sometimes she got a glimpse of their own hues, yet they always averted their gaze: as did she. Eventually, though, the day finally ended. Luckily it had been the first day, so not much work was given out---
especially since that one teacher felt horrible for her. First day, and she cried? Pathetic, yet they all seemed sympathetic. That worked for her, so she wouldn't complain.
As she reached for the soft cloth of her book bag, she noticed something odd; someone walking towards her. Muscles tensing up, adding that anxious effect, she hurridly tried to haul it up an leave. One thing with the stuttering and shy persona was that she had an excuse to not talk to the classmates that seemed to wish to want to bother her. Shy girl or not, she wasn't quick enough.
Hazel hues flicked up to see the boy's features. He had messy black hair, glasses that framed his freckled face, and a stupid dorky smile that was plastered upon his features. The smile irritated her--made her want to punch his face in.
She might have anger issues, she supposed.
"A--Ah uh..uahhm.."She started up, playing the shy girl rather well. "A--ah wah..what d--do ya---yah want..?" Her face lit up with embarrassment, another thing she had learnt to do. "A--Ah tah--that sounded rah---rude...Sa--So sorry..!" She shuffled to get out of her seat and bow to the other, as if apologizing in another form.
The boy's face kept it's smile, yet he waved off the other's stuttering.
"Don't worry 'bout it!" He cheered out. "You don't have to apologize, I was actually coming over here to apologize for everyone in the class---and maybe show you around a bit!" He offered, scratching the back of his neck slightly.
Oh how she wished she could have been the cold bitch that she had started out as today. Then, then she'd have an excuse to smack him across the face: and hopefully wipe off that ridiculous smile at the same time. "O--oh!" she exclaimed, poking her fingers together. "A..ah..sa--sure! I..if you don't mind.." She quickly glanced at the clock, and made a small 'eep'! noise. "A--ah we shou...should get going!" She scrambled to pick up her half-assed excuse for a bookbag and dash out--hopefully losing the boy in the process.
Nope, he was still there...And still smiling--it was like his mouth didn't move. Made her want to slap it more. It was unnatural to smile that way--and constantly too. He directed her to her next class which whoopdtey doo was his class as well. That's when it dawned upon her.
The counter lady set this up. She deduced with a slight sour thought. Regardless the day went on, and time ticked by. Nothing she could do to stop that, of course.
That's how it was, right?
You live your life doing what you can to get by, never really questioning anything until you're allowed too, and even then you're not supposed to ask certain questions. Even if you do, and you regret it, you have no choice but to continue onward in your life, constantly wasting time until the final grain of sand was poured.
Woah.
She needed to stop zoning out in Math class. She figured.
'if I continue to think like that I'm going to start questioning why I'm alive'
She shook her head slightly, and rubbed her face with her hands; the warm palms of her hands seemed to be the softest and coziest thing at the moment, and she adored it. The moment she pulled away, and looked up to the teacher she realized it;
that was completely in persona for her! She tried to get herself hyped up about that..yet..what was the point? She always did a great job fooling others around her, as well as herself, that she was someone she wasn't.
To them she'd be the shy girl that they'd warm up to
To them she'd be the stuttering girl they'd try to 'fix'
To them she'd be the girl who could 'do no wrong'
To them, she wasn't who she truly was, she was
not the assassin that thirsted for blood that
tasted like Wine of red hues.
Oh but that wasn't the truth, was it? No no, someone figured that the 'new girl' was up to something. Someone didn't believe the act for a minute. That person was a girl who was in all of the classes, someone who had her own secrets that she didn't voice out.
"oh my LOOK at those eyes
look at the t r o u b l e that they hide inside
I see the flicker of the pain on the rise
oh my LOOK at those eyes
maybe they’re like M I N E ;
things I [ wish ] I did not see
I will push away all the DIRT && DEBRIS "
Whispered the girl under her breath, un-moving eyes locked onto the back of Arashi's head as she trailed not too fair behind her.
YOU ARE READING
Wine Red
Ficção Científica"One day everyone will see what its like to be lost in grey and wine red" Young Arashi never really did know what it was like to have a 'normal' life. Her normal was a nice night with blood splattered...
