Once Craved

Chapter - 4

Avantika was glad to be sitting because her knees went weak. "My God..."

Approaching the table, Abhimanyu sat and dug into the food she'd plated for him. His gaze was determined and challenging. So like him. Romance was in his blood. At heart, he believed love conquered all.

She was breathless with the need to cry. He was a warrior prince, set upon a quest to save his fair princess from a life of toil. He wanted to spirit her away to his tower, where he would drape her in jewels and see that her every whim was met.

If only she wanted to be rescued.

Abhimanyu wiped his mouth with a napkin, then drank from one of the bottles of water that had been artfully arranged in the center of the table. Pushing away from her place setting, Avantika stood and went to him. He slid his chair back, making room for her.

Lifting her skirt, she straddled him, cupping his face in her hands and trusting him to support her back with his tender grip. Her fingers brushed his hair from his forehead. His eyes closed as if her touch soothed him, but she knew it invariably caused him pain in the long run.

"You're so angry," she whispered, brushing her lips over his brow, dying inside because she wished she could always be there to comfort him. She wanted that so much, she couldn't help but question her refusal to try...To take the risk...

"I was," he agreed, pulling her closer. "For a moment, I regretted ever meeting you. It pissed me off to think that way. The years we were together were the happiest of my life. I would never change them."

"And I've been so scared that you would regret it. That there was no way to avoid us falling apart."

His fingers kneaded into her hips. "I thought you grew out of being insecure about us."

"I did. The comment about the supermodel...it wasn't to say I was forgettable, just that first loves fade for most people." She wrinkled her nose at his arched brow. "Well, they do. But really, I wasn't worried about you being the problem. I was worried about me. I was worried that I'd screw it all up by being miserable."

Abhimanyu's head tilted to the side, his gaze narrowing. "As if I would ever allow you to be."

She smiled at his arrogant assumption that nothing could go wrong if he said it couldn't. Placing her hand over his heart, she felt its strong and steady beat against her palm. A heart that beat for her alone, just as hers had been in his keeping for more than half her life. "Do you know why I work at the shop?"

"It supports your entire family and you're damned good at fixing cars."

"Yes, thank God, because I don't know how to do anything else. I'm lucky that I enjoy it. I go to work every day knowing that my brothers are going to make me laugh, my mom is going to bring something delicious in for lunch, and I'll get to fuss over my dad. I honestly have no idea what I'd do with myself if I didn't work, and I couldn't see how it would be possible for me to do so while you're making multimillion-dollar deals. I'm not sure I'd even enjoy wrenching if my family wasn't around while I did it. And part of the magic might be that I work on the cars of people I know and grew up around. I don't know. I just knew that imagining working in a cramped shop off a busy New York street with a bunch of guys I don't know and cars belonging to people I might not see again...it made me unhappy just thinking about it."

His hand began to stroke up and down her back, gentling her, which made her realize she was trembling. "I'm listening."

Avantika pressed a kiss to his firm mouth. "I hate to think that I'm one of those people who detest change. I do want to travel and explore. But I want to work, too. I just couldn't see how I could be happy long-term trying to be the kind of partner a man of your stature needs. And my unhappiness would make you unhappy. It really came down to logistics: you couldn't stay and I couldn't go with you. But I knew you'd try to make it work, at great sacrifice to yourself. I was worried you might decide to stay here, for me, when I knew your heart was with joining your father. I wanted you to go to Stanford. I wanted you to do the things you always talked about doing. But most of all, I didn't want us to make each other miserable. I would rather have us end with one bad memory between us, than with years' worth of them."