"Dreams we won't bear to lose. You can't just move on from something you desire with your heart and soul. There's a word that can describe the feeling of leaving something behind, but, it doesn't exist in my vocabulary. I always do what I need to ge...
You are back at your office after the tricky noon you had. Until now, you are still wondering what to do with the opportunities you have and what you are willing to do for the rest of your life. There are so many things you love to do and you know you can do some from time to time but others require all your attention and care.
Right now, you are trying to concentrate on helping Sai since she needs to finish some chapters for the manga she's working on. And as you are doing that, you noticed that Hao's place is empty; he may be with his boyfriend but hopefully this time they aren't arguing.
But before you could continue working calmly, Minghao opened the door and got towards his desk upset. He started to pick up his stuff while looking destroyed.
-Hey, what happened? – You asked concerned while glancing at him.
-I'm done... it's over – Minghao repeated upset.
-Hao – You murmured before standing up, then you got towards him and started to hug him.
He hugged you back while finding comfort against your embrace. You are worried since you've never seen him this way before.
-Breathe in and out; everything will be alright – You assured.
He nodded before getting away from you, then he sat on the edge of his desk.
-I broke up with him. My boyfriend was Luang, the editor on chief – Minghao revealed in between tears. –His ego made me get over him; he just cares about himself and I assured that after I broke up with him, because he fired me – He disclosed.
-You have to be kidding... that's not fair, you are an amazing editor and artist – You stated.
-Thank you for saying so – He smiled slightly. –I think I'm going to still taking my photos and make a living out of it while I can, also, if another opportunity appears on my way, I won't reject it – Hao spoke.
-They'll be many to come and I don't think you'll have trouble finding a new job – You admitted. –Everybody knows how you edit and even write, so, don't feel stressed out by this; maybe what happened will help you to get some time for yourself – You said kindly.
-Maybe you are right – He sighed. –Thank you, Andy. I hope you can find your way too – Hao smiled.
-Oh, yeah... I'm still in a debate with my thoughts and desires – You said annoyed.
-Is it that bad? – He questioned surprised.
-Let's say that it isn't as easy as I thought – You assured. –I just never expected my hobbies to be all mixed up with my current job – You disclosed.
-And what do you want to do? I mean, what matters the most to you? – Hao questioned.
-I think making Yuzuru happy is one of my main priorities but I know he would understand if I didn't want to participate in the pairs program; then on the other side, Zack and Sai are cheering me up to start a music career as a violinist. So, I don't know what to do since I have my job as an editor and creator – You explained.
-And what makes you happier? – He questioned.
-Well, I don't know yet... I believe I might want to think about it more before taking a final decision – You admitted.
-So, take your time and don't make a decision you might regret later on – Minghao said. –Just like I did – He sighed with a settle smile.
You held his shoulder while looking at him with a grin on your face, he just looked at you while breathing calmly.
*Nighttime*
You are back at your place after helping Sai out. And as soon as you arrived, you found a letter on the floor of your apartment which you haven't opened yet. So, without hesitating more you left your stuff on top of the coffee table of the living room before opening the letter.
As soon as you saw your name written, you recognized the handwriting immediately. It would be impossible for you to forget how he writes. Without a lot of excitement, you opened it and started to clear out your throat before reading it.
"Andrea.
I know that things didn't go as we wanted. I messed up badly by leaving you for someone else and now I understand I was a fool for not appreciating what I had in front of me. I also know that it's way too late to apologize and tell you how much I miss you; however, I want to still fight for you as before. I got the news of who is in your heart nowadays. You wonder how I know but it was quite obvious when I saw you with him while walking through the streets. Both seem truly in love but that won't stop me from getting you back, and even though it sounds selfish, I want you to know that everything I'm writing down on this piece of paper is true.
I ended my relationship because I wanted to find you again. I got the idea of having you again like before, so, I will fight until that happens again. And it doesn't matter if I don't deserve you because I'm going to pay you back all the damage I made to your heart.
He doesn't have what I do. So, please think about me before him; I don't want you to be with another one who can't love you as I do.
Xander."
After finish reading the letter, you folded it again and left it on top of the table.
Yes, this day got way crazier than before this noon.
You sighed while smiling anxiously, after all, it was a cute letter but at the same time, it showed you how much he's messed up. Also, he's showing up that he hasn't changed one bit by reading what he has to say.
As you picked up the letter again, you eyed the words and sentences. You started to roll your eyes after every phrase since you think he isn't completely honest with you and himself.
Better than him? You wish.
Just like that, you started to chuckle softly by the occurrences he had to tell you about through a letter that was meant to be "romantic". But before you could continue, your phone buzzed which made you leave the letter aside once again.
You looked at the phone and saw the notifications screen. The last news is about the pairs' figure skating that will take part in the next competition in Toronto. It feels now that this opportunity is chasing you like wildfire, and it's not stopping any time soon.
Something inside of you is telling you to get free from the ordinary and live the life you never imagined to have. Also, your mind and heart were sure that this decision was meant for you to take; you may lose or win but that doesn't matter since the lesson in here is that you take risks and try to reach something you thought it was impossible.
I think I made up my mind.
You sighed calmly before going to your contacts' list, then you started to call Brian Orser, ready to tell him your final decision.
