Just as soon as I thought I knew him, he flips the switch and is a totally different person.
Maybe that's the way he was. But I couldn't help that my mind wonder why he was like that. One minute we'd be joking around and laughing and the next he didn't even look my way.
He was weird and defensive.
He liked to make fun of everyone, especially me.
He'd push me away and yell at me.
Tell me I wasn't good enough for him and that I never would be.
He'd pull me closer and kiss me whenever he wanted, smirking and whispering nothing into my ear.
He'd tell me he needed me, tell me I was the only one for him, that I would always be.
He'd tell me lies to get what he wanted.
But in the end I never figured out what was the lie and what wasn't.
He was like two different people, complete opposites.
To anyone else they'd say he was crazy.
But of course no one knew him like I did.
No one saw him flip the switch, they only saw one side at a time.
Only saw what they wanted to see.
I was the only one who knew the real him, and he knew that. I knew that.
If it were up to me we would have been together a while ago, but nothing ever goes my way.
He made sure I always knew he was in charge. Of both of his lives. Of me.
Was I a little crazy in the head for staying with him?
Of course, isn't that what love is all about?
Being crazy for the person you love? Letting them into your life? Giving them everything?
That's what I am though, in love with him.
And sometimes I liked to think he's in love with me too.
But who am I to say?
