I'd Like To See You In Hell

Desperate means cause for desperate measures

This was stupid. This was insanely fucking stupid. No, Clint really knew what this was, this was... desperation . All Clint needed to do was snag a date for his brother's upcoming wedding, and he couldn't even do that right. Now, here he was, practically hours before the wedding, fucking researching how to summon a demon. Because if he couldn't manage to get a date like a normal human being, the least he could do was sell his soul to get a date. How hard could that be? The last thing he wanted to do was show up dateless to his brother's wedding and to be made a fool of by Barney. What's the worst that could happen?

"How to summon a demon with this one party trick," Clint murmured, fingers scrolling the results on his phone. The bright light was a clash to his otherwise darkened bedroom. It showcased his blonde locks that had been messed with a number of times out of anxiety, and the heavy black bags under his eyes. "Seriously? Fuckin' click bait for a demon? Whatever."

"Succubus? No, no I don't need sex. Well -" Clint thought about it, for point two seconds before deciding against it. Sex wasn't the outcome he wanted here. He needed a date. He finally picked a website at random.

The website suggested that he was to get naked, going on about how it would make him closer to the Earth and demons liked to see what they were offered. He didn't mind that, not like this demon would be riding his dick to try to take his soul. Right, let's see. Naked. Knife. Ring of candles. Insignia painted on the floor in white paint. And, right, the last thing to do, blood and chanting.

The article didn't necessarily say it had to be his blood. Clint was able to get a pint of pig's blood from the local butcher. The guy didn't question, so Clint didn't say he needed it to summon a demon. Soaking a rag in the vat of cold blood, he was able to hold it above the insignia, to let the blood drip down from the ratty, oily rag and onto the hardwood floor. He started to chant the latin words displayed on his phone, praying to whatever deity was listening that he was doing this right. Last he needed was to summon an ancient viking soul, hell bent on destroying the Earth and not some normal demon who would take his soul in exchange for a date. That made him snort.

It evidently worked because the insignia was now glowing a bright white. As the candle flames shot up to the water-stained roof, a half thought pulled in the back of his head that he was not getting his security deposit back from this. Clint shielded his eyes from the bright light, stumbling back and into his dresser. Something fell off and rolled under his bed, forgotten about already. The room had grown increasingly warm, to the point that he could feel the sweat trickling down his brow and burning his eyes. Still, he almost couldn't look away. The ratted blanket that was thrown over his bed, claimed from the Salvation Army, was now smoldering and on fire. As terrifying as this was, Clint couldn't turn away. As the flames started to die, flickering out, and the room got cold again, Clint was able to make out a figure in the middle of his room.

On top of the now permanent smoke damage, not to mention paint and blood stains on the floor, the entire room smelled of sulfur. Definitely not getting that security deposit back.

"Am I really that unattractive that you must wrinkle your nose at me and make that face?" The tall, slender figure spoke in a soft voice, a curious tone to it. It sounded almost feminine. There were female demons? Right, Barton, focus.

"How did -- it's dark ," Clint countered, slowly and shakily stepping near the creature. He could make out an outline at best. She was taller than him by a few good inches, with horns poking out of her hair. And very much naked. At least he thought so.

"I can see in the dark, just as you can see during the day," she replied. "Why are you naked?"

"The...the ritual, it called for me to be naked. Why are you naked?" Despite how he couldn't see her, Clint felt her eyes travel over his body. She made a satisfying sound in the back of her throat even as he covered his crotch with his hand.

"Because you just summoned me, mortal. Why else would I not be naked? You humans and your clothes. You were born naked and you will die naked." The figure snorted and despite the fact that he couldn't see, Clint knew she was rolling her eyes. "However, you don't have to be naked in order to summon a demon. The blood and chanting work just fine, with and without clothes. But I do like what I see, now that you're giving me that chance. Give me a twirl, little hawk." She made the sound again as Clint twirled around, near purr like. "For what purpose did you summon me, the Ruler of Hell? Well, that's a formal title. I prefer to be called Natasha, it's much easier and quicker to pronounce."

Clint made a noise, a squeak in the back of his throat. "Natasha... I...I'm...Clint. Clint Barton." Now that he was here, standing in this dark room, with just the dying, flickering flames of the candles, he realized how ridiclous this fucking was. Summoning a demon for a date? Selling your soul so you didn't show up to your own brother's wedding dateless? How desperate can you get? Clearly, very desperate. "I...I need a date. I need a date to my brother's wedding. It's...today, in a few hours."

"I know who you are, Clint Barton." The demon, Ruler of Hell, Natasha stared down at Clint with a blank expression, speaking in a deadpan voice. "I'm not sure which part I am having trouble understanding - that you need a date for the wedding of this brother of yours, or that you waited until now to summon me, or the fact that you summoned a demon to be your date."

Clint grumbled, scrubbing a hand over his scrunched up face. His hand continued into his hair, leaving track marks where he touched. He stomped his foot, something Natasha found adorable. "I'm desperate, okay?! I-I know it's stupid and silly and pretty much dangerous to summon a demon, but I am desperate. Is that what you want to hear? That the mortal who summoned you is such a low life piece of shit that he couldn't even get a pity date to his brother's wedding? It's not like it's easy, alright? Barney is a piece of shit and if Laura wasn't the nicest person on Earth, I wouldn't be going. Barney makes it very difficult for me to keep friends and even for those friends to be around him." The blonde took in a ragged breath, breaking his long bit of rambling. "Look, I'll do anything, just..just say you'll go. I'll sell my soul to you or whatever you demons want nowadays."

"To say that you'll do anything for the Ruler of Hell, puts a lot of power in my hand," Natasha purred, leaning far too close to Clint. "Someone who isn't well, me , could use that against you. I advise that you're careful for what you wish for."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Power and danger and all that. No offense, but after what I've lived through, you're not that scary," the blonde huffed, rolling his eyes. "So, will you go with me?"

She was quiet for a long period of time, almost too quiet, to the point Clint thought she'd left without making a noise. "Yes." Before the blonde could get too excited, she raised a solid finger to his lips. "At a later date, we will discuss what your payment will be. For now, I think you need some rest before you show up at your brother's wedding with bags under your eyes."

"You'll go?!" He couldn't help the excitement in his tone. "That's great! But I don't owe you anything right now? You don't want my soul or money?"