Everything is a lie

Chapter one

"Your phone is ringing, Wake up your phone is ringing!"

I know it's not, but I hear it, its vibration buzzing against the desk.

Stuff like this happens all the time, my mother used to tell me I was special, but this drives me crazy sometimes... all the time

I know its not ringing, its all in my head, she used to tell me that when I was 9 but I'm 35 and I know it's a lie considering she hasn't seen my since I was 25 when she bought me this house- but I can hear it, I can see the screen glowing with the green and red buttons that allow me to answer or not.

Don't answer it Erik, go back to bed.

"It's her she's calling."

And just like that I imagine her, her red hair blowing in the wind at the beach, her Sunkissed shoulders with a thin strapped bikini top. She sits on her knees applying sunscreen. Her hair blowing the sun glinting off it reminding me of that flowing red dress she wore last week when we went out to dinner.
She turns and I flick my gaze to the ocean, the sea glimmering and dark blue impermeable to the people that swims through its waters that they never will touch the bottom they merely break through the surface.

"Are you okay, what are you thinking about?" she asks.

But when I look up her face isn't the one, I expected it to be. It's not her face. The one I gaze upon while she is sleeping, I memorized the curve of her nose and the little ridges in her lips, but the lips my eyes meet now aren't hers.

"What's wrong darling_

"Answer the phone! "The demon says.

I dive over for the phone and answer.

"Hello."

"Hey, Erik, I'll be at your house in 20 minutes I'm on the bus right now some weird guy at the front of the bus keeps yelling at people through the window"

My lips spread at the sound of her voice.

"Oh okay-

"Were you sleep? Your voice sounds like you've been gargling nails, Erik its 3 pm how were you sleep."

I look over to the clock on my nightstand.

"I-I don't know-

"Geez, what were you doing last night?"

"I um...I...I don't know."

"Silly boy...well I'll be there in a little bit, I really miss you babe."

"I do to."

She makes a kissing noise and ends the call.

I think of her body, soft and smooth, her eyes and lips, our kisses, our love...love making for hours...and hours.

The demon was right, like always he tells me to follow his orders and sometimes I hate it, but when I listen he is always right and he protects me, when I fight with him he gets angry, and he yells and he makes animals and monsters attack me. But he knows that he can't do this forever and I want to become independent.

My heart swells and I stand.

"Your hair, change your hair, now, she doesn't like your hair down hurry, she will leave you if your hair is down.!"

I walk to the bathroom I look at myself in the mirror. My pale skin, and this body, way too perfect to be mine, too perfect for me and this life I live.

Sometimes I feel like I'm not even here in my skin, I'm just a voice along with the demon and the many others but I see through eyes that should be mine. I can't tell If I'm here or not.