Jumanji (Riren/Ereri)

Chapter 6

[I probably have like 20 grammar mistakes in there but enjoy I know I pulled a Togashi]

Levi's p.o.v.
About time his beluga whale sized eyebrows got here. "Oi Erwin"

Eren's p.o.v.
Oh shit why shorty look kinda...kinda hot though- *ahem* what am I thinking?! Snap outta that!
I'm straight!....that's a lie! and the other guy with the mustache looks buffer than Erwin. Damn they're on some Jojo's bizzar adventure shit. I need to start working out.

Armin' s p.o.v.
Did they make this place? That would be so much work I mean... Erwin does seem like a strong and independent person... Am I blushing? No no, that's the sun. Yes. This sunlight is giving us 90 degree burns.

Sasha's p.o.v.
Where do they keep their food?
Connie's p.o.v.
...I gotta shiT sOn

God's p.o.v.
The short structured man known as Levi Ackerman didn't even scan the group of kids at first, he was listening to Erwin explain what had happened when he caught something in the corner of his steel grey eye. Big bright turquoise eyes, they got his attention and so he turned to whoever possessed them. A beautiful boy with soft brown hair and tan skin, he was a beauty. Those gorgeous emerald eyes only got wider as the boy stared back at the older man, his cheeks turning a light pink and heart racing-
Connie:"I WANNA KNOW WHAT LOVE IIISS!~ I WANT YOU TO SHOW
MEEE!~"
Jean:"I WANNA KNOW WHAT LOVE IS!"
Eren:"Fuck yall"
Connie:"We're just being good friends!" :)

Levi:*sigh*"Great idea went and brought a whole daycare in here. Well this just means there's more mouths to feed tonight"
Mikasa:"Eren will be getting a better meal than the rest of us though"😏
Levi:"Fuck was that supposed to mean brat?"
Mikasa:"Don't call me a brat when you're shorter, Hitler"
Levi:"Or what Japanese Karen?"
Mikasa:"Or I'll fuck you up"
Levi:"I'd like to see you try"
Eren:"The drama"
Jean:"Not the Karen-"
Armin:"Uh- hey let's calm down okay?-"
Connie:"Fight!"
Sasha:"Take his shoes!"

Levi gave the teens a menacing look that zipped them right up.
(Zipped their mouths not pants, no one had their fly down ✋)

Armin:"uh- We'll help with the food! Thank you for taking us all in"
Levi:"You should learn some manners from this boy, get to work"
Mikasa:"Who said you could order me around?"
Levi:"Me, myself and I. Now get. To work."

Eren:"Call life support"
Armin:"Nah I think these two can take a hit"
Eren:"Not for them for Jean"
Jean:"why me?"
Eren:"If one of them kills the other they're landing on you"
Jean:"....damn"

Connie:"Help I've fallen and I can't get up"
Sasha:"Sir call this number one more time cause your clumsy ass fell, this is the 7th time you've fallen this week, and it's only Monday"

[Time skip to when they're hunting for food]

Sasha:"Ok this rifle they gave us is useful but just in case, I'll teach you guys how to use a bow and arrow, I grew up in the woods so I have more experience in hunting with a simple weapon and being in the wilderness in general, you guys would probably wipe your asses with poison ivy"

Eren:"Why is that accurate though"
Connie:"I know right"
Sasha:"Now let's get to it, Connie I've actually tought you how before do you remember?"
Connie:"Yes ma'am"
Sasha:"Everyone, Connie will demonstrate, there's a zebra over there. Hit it"
Eren:"Go Connie" :D

Connie moved closer to get a better shot, he pulled the arrow back stretching the bow's string. Getting ready to strike...
Everyone:👁👄👁

The suspense-
Connie:*farts loudly and scares off the zebra*
Jean:"WHAT THE FUCK"
Sasha:*wheeze*
Mikasa:"HAHAH-"
Eren:"Your stupid!"
Armin:*wheeze*
Connie:"That was that cake we ate back in the village mate"
Sasha:"Gimme that bow I'll do it"

Sasha found the zebra again and actually got it. Me and Jean grabbed it to bring back to camp, while walking we saw a rabbit hopping and wanted to see Armin hunt.

Mikasa:"Okay Armin there's nine people back at camp we need just a little more than a zebra especially with sasha, so you'll get that bunny right there"
Armin:"No! I'd go vegan for that bunny"
Jean:"Come on Armin you're a man, act like one-"
Armin:"Since when?"
Eren:"uh-"
Sasha:"oop-"
Connie:"kay then-"
Mikasa:"Called it"

[Meanwhile at camp]

Levi:"I'm giving you three seconds to explain yourself"
Erwin:"I wanted to fuck the little blond one"
Levi:"Erwin"
Erwin:"Listen I saw their new faces in the bazaar and knew they weren't NPCs plus they're just kids Levi, they were in trouble and I helped them. I know you don't like kids but we should help them get home. Have some kindness for once and be nice."
Levi:"I'm taking the first response"
Erwin:"Why?"
Levi:"cause I know you didn't just tell me to be nice"

Erwin:"Ok, Mike what's your take?"
Mike:"....I-"
Screams and gunshots were heard in the distance and they were getting closer.

Levi:"....Well if that doesn't sound like a bunch of kids who failed at hunting I don't know what does"
Erwin:"Alright let's go-"
"SON OF A BITCH"
"WHAT THE FUCK-"
"AAAHHHHH!!!"
"HIJO DE PUTA MADRE-"
"ERRWIIINN!"
"AAHHHH-"
These children came scurrying to the adult trio's feet at the speed of immigration.

Levi:"Shut. Up! What happened?!"
Erwin:"And one at a time"

Eren:"Okokok so we were somewhat hunting! Then we see a hog"

[Flashback]
Connie:"GET IT!"
Everyone chased that poor animal down from every direction. Cursing at one another the entire time of course.
Eren:"MIKASA IT'S HEADING YOUR WAY"
Sasha:"NOW"
Mikasa tackled down the hog like this was football but the hog obviously wouldn't stay still so Jean jumped in to help.
And I mean literally jumped in. Nacho Libre style.
Armin:"Okay great job everyone!"
Eren:"Yeah we can't hunt for shit but it was fun"

"Oh my~"

Everyone turned around to see who made two simple words sound orgasmic as fuck

"That was quite entertaining~"
A tall pale redhead was leaning against a tree with his arms crossed. He smirked and licked his lips as he examined every single minor in his view.

Jean:"What in the American playboy"
Mikasa:"Someone come get their mans-"
Eren:"He looks like he rides a unicorn"
Connie:💀"He said you'll float too"
Armin:"Looking like a box of lucky charms with legs"
Sasha:😭"please, he looks like a stripper named Taste the rainbow"

Armin:"He said ight I'ma head out"
Sasha:"what?"
Armin:"Cause he's gone"
Jean:"Oh shit"
Eren:"Excuse me-"
The perverted man appeared behind them still smiling.
"Did someone say Gon?~"
"AAHH-"
[End of flashback]

Armin:"Things escalated from there but I think we lost him"
Mikasa:"We had to get violent"

Levi:"So Hisoka's back, eh?"
Erwin:"That's a problem"
Levi:"No shit Erwin he pops out of the bushes like the swiper when he smells a minor"

Armin:"Is that why you didn't want us here?"
Levi:"It's one reason"
Connie:"In that case we'll leave ourselves byyye!"
Connie started walking away when he was grabbed from his head and turned around by a big hand. "Hey man say man-" he looked at who it was which caused him to look up.
Because it was Mike. "Uh.. after you man"
Eren:"pussy"
Jean:"You can't be talking"

Sasha:"So are we going back for the zebra and hog? Or?..."
Mikasa:"That leprechaun might still be over there so I'll go, I have the rifle"
Eren:"But no bullets"
Mikasa checked the two barrels and looked at Sasha "Sasha! You fired BOTH of them?!"
Sasha:"HE WENT AFTER CONNIE TOO! I HAD TO SAVE HIM!"😭
Connie:"You call shooting at ME saving me?!! I thought you knew how to use a rifle!"
Sasha:"In mY defense Connie! He was too fast"
Jean:"No one tried helping me when he literally dragged me by my legs"
Eren:"He can have you"

Jean:"I-... Y'all are disrespectful. Levi do you see this?"
Levi with his eyes closed:"No"

Jean:"All y'all can suck Hisoka's fingernails give me that bow I'll get the food"
Eren:"Start the funeral"
Jean:"Like you guys care about me enough to give me a funeral"
Armin:"We do care!"

Sasha:"It'd just be a shitty funeral"
Connie:"And I'd probably drop the casket"

Jean walked off into the jungle again to retrieve their earned food if other animals haven't started eating them yet.

[End of this chapter]