When she woke up the first thing she noticed was that nothing had changed. The way she felt, the way her life was lived for her.
She realizes she didn't wake by herself but because of someone screaming her name. Just like in the past when she was still living at her parents.
She replied to the person who was screaming. What is it? No much of a reply came. In the end she did get out of bed. The house is cold. Like it always is. The heater is almost never on. Not because it ain't working. No, because according to him it ain't needed. He works and is all day out. She's at home wearing layers of clothes over eachother to try to keep warm.
When she get down to the first floor she finds him holding a door of the closet. Meanwhile complaining. He managed to pull the door half out of its place and now complains to her like she did it.
What's new? Whatever happens it is always her mistake. It doesn't make sence to defend herself or
discuss at all. He will always win. Also when he's not right. It would be only a loss of energy and time and another disappointment. The discussions could easily get to a bad point. The last time she reminds out of total desperation and tiredness she automutilated so bad her face was black and blue.
Explaining and talking are words that seem to be not existing. A normal conversation will never take place. As soon as she tries to defend herself he will push her back into her corner. Hurting her with his words. Or what rarely happens his hands.
She doesn't know why she keeps accepting it. Why she doesn't get away. Maybe because she's to scared for all what will come after that. One time she had the strength to tell him that for her it was over. His reaction was to make her go away but without her share of the money from the houses.
That would lead him to have 3 houses and money and her without a roof and no money to buy or rent. Unfair. She blocked. Got stuck in the situation and stayed. Ever since she wonders if this must be it for the rest of her life... NO!
