VITRIOL | Shane Walsh

XV

I had been forced around by Negan's men In preparation for my big day all morning and I was well and truly exhausted after being prodded and pushed into making decisions about the wedding decorations the Saviors had managed to find. I hadn't heard back from Shane and a whole day had passed since I practically begged him to risk his life to be with me on the road. One more sleep and I'd be leaving here, with or without him.

I was sat in the wives' room when Amber burst in, tears streaming from her eyes. She was cradling herself in the armchair in the corner when I gestured to the rest of them that I'd handle the situation. My arm wrapped around the back of her shoulders and I pulled her into my chest where she just sobbed.

"I can't do this anymore Pricilla, I love Mark too much" she mumbled reminding me of my own thoughts. She confided in me when she realised I was sneaking around with Shane like her. If I didn't run away and carried on with Negan's grand plan, she'd be relieved of the duties that were causing her sorrow, so I did feel partially guilty.

"Just think of why you did this in the first place, your momma needed those meds." I pulled her face up and wiped away her tear with my thumbs. "You need to dry them pretty little eyes or you'll get Mark in trouble"

"I know, I don't know how you do it" she sniffled

"I don't know either" I pulled her back in for a hug, sat there until lunchtime came around and we all headed downstairs to eat in the main hall for a change. Really, I wanted to snoop around the market while no one was there and to grab a few things for my escape.

"You go ahead, I've left something behind"

"Oh you sure? I can wait." Amber insisted.

"Nah, you better go get some of the custard they've made before it runs out" I laughed separating from the group of women who visibly looked like they didn't belong in this time. 

The market was empty when I arrived so I had free pickings at the inventory. A simple black duffle bag was sat on the edge of someone's bed in the dorms nearby so I decided that I needed it more than them and stole it. When I exited the makeshift sleeping quarters I heard heavy footsteps and turned my head to see one of the high-status Saviors making their way over.

"So this is why you're not having lunch with the rest of them,"  Shane commented while following me around the stalls.

"I didn't think my current clothes were...appropriate. It'll be nice to know what trousers feel like again."

"You've got your heart set on leaving haven't you?"

"Damn right I do" I picked up a pair of black utility pants and stuffed them into the bag. I began rummaging through the t-shirts as he walked away only to return with a pair of black lace-up boots and hold them up for my approval.

"You'll be better off in these, trainers will get wrecked...they're your size"

"Oh thanks, where'd you find them?" I asked as I tucked them away along with a plain white tee.

"Bunk 39. Don't worry you'll never see anyone again" I jokingly scowled at him before heading over to the counter covered in utensils picking up a flask. As I was about to zip the bag up Shane grabbed a flask for himself and shoved it inside. He then grabbed the bag off of my shoulder and draped it over his with a lot less struggle than me. "I'll hide it in my room"

I couldn't help but hide the fact I was overjoyed he wanted to come with me. A wide smiled suddenly overtook my face and I tackled him with so much energy we'd be on the floor if it wasn't for his strength. My chin was probably digging into his chest when I looked up at him but he obviously didn't care as he let out a deep chuckle.

"Can we pick up where we left off all those years ago?" I whispered lifting my hand to his neck and rubbing my thumb across his jaw.

"I'd be upset if we didn't, baby" he leant down and simply rested his forehead on mine

"I wonder how Negan and Arat are going to feel about this? What if he sends out men to track us down?"

"We've had no problem killing to protect ourselves before"

"Otis was a long time ago Shane"

"Surely you know Otis's blood is a tiny drop in the pool of it on my hands"

"What if we just tried to do this murder-free? Clean our hands of our past selves"

"Baby, that shit doesn't wash off in the sink. If we have to spill blood to keep each other safe then we have to." He sighed and I felt the air brush across my face. It'd been so long since we had been this close and all I wanted to do was eliminated the distance between us and claim the lips that were rightfully mine. I dared to close the space but the light chatter approaching us forced my eyes open and out bodies apart.

"I'll see you midnight tomorrow" he winked before tugging on the bag strap and walking away.

- - -

"Honey, I'm home!" Negan cheesily sang as he waltzed into his room. I looked up from my copy of 'Brave New World' to see him stood with a large clothes hanger bag draped across his arm. I closed the cover on my book and set it down on the coffee table as he set Lucille down. 

"What you got in that?"

"No welcome back? How's your day been? I missed you?" he teased and walked over pecking me on the lips.

"How has your day been then?" I asked politely playing along with his game.

"Shit...But" he pushed me towards the bedroom and forced the heavy bag into my arms "You can make it a lot better by trying this on for size." 

He closed the door behind him and I shoved the bag onto the bed pulling down the zip. As the contents were slowly revealed, I wanted to cry once again at the visibly pristine fabric of the wedding dress but these tears wouldn't be tears of happiness. They were bitter with the thought that I'd not have the joy of choosing my own dress like I'd dreamt of doing as a little girl.

I refused to try it on and when Negan asked to see it I mumbled some rubbish about it being bad luck to see the bride before the wedding.

"Did you like it?"

"I loved it." I tried to say with genuine adoration.

"You hated it didn't you?" His face was slightly angry "I knew I should have just chosen it myself." 

"Negan honestly, I love it" I hated it but it's not like I'm going to wear it...ever. We both settled down for the night and were nodding off to sleep when I remembered his problem from a few days ago.

"Did you ever sort that group out that killed your men?" I was genuinely fascinated to learn there were other communities out there who weren't scared of Negan like Hilltop and The Kingdom. Maybe they'd be stupid enough to take me and Shane in.

"Damn right I did. They're exactly where I want them and tomorrow night is going to be a learning kerb. Could be someones last day on earth and they don't know yet." Perfect. Shane would be left behind to watch over sanctuary while everyone else was gone and we could slip out without anyone noticing.

"Someones last day on earth? Sounds delightful."