7: Opening Up

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Michael crunched up even more bringing his knees close to his body and pulling the thick blanket over himself till it covered his neck. For the past few months, he had been feeling cold randomly. He would wear layers and layers of warm jackets to rehearsals but would still be shivering. None of the staff ever bothered to ask him whether he was okay. As long as he showed up for the rehearsals, everything was fine. 

Tears rolled down his face. He knew he was not okay, but no one seemed to care. The turmoil inside of him was killing him. he was no longer the young Michael Jackson that the world had admired so much. He was unsure whether he would be able to perform even one show and here the organizers were adding show after show. His confidence was crumbing, he was physically in pain and… unfortunately the dependency on pain medication had returned. 

He felt his phone vibrate and looked at it. It was Aly

“Hello” he softly spoke, supressing a sob

“Michael, are you okay?”

He broke down hearing Aly’s voice. 

“Nothing is right Aly, I don’t know whether I’ll be able to do this”

“Michael, tell me what happened. I am listening and I am here for you”

Michael narrated the events of the day and of the past months that had been torturing him

“you’re scared to go back on stage?”

“yes, I don’t know whether I’ll be able to do it”

“Michael Joseph Jackson, you are the greatest entertainer in the world and nothing and no one can take that away from you. You have revolutionized the music industry. Every artist today is inspired by you, but above that Michael you are one of the most, scratch that, the most humane person I know. What you have done for children and people across the world is incredible. Nobody comes close to being the humanitarian you are. You’ve been betrayed a dozen times and yet you’re unafraid to love again. You love with all your heart. You have the most loyal fans in the world Michael and that is because you love them back just as much and more than they love you. you are the best father to three beautiful kids. Michael I can say this without a doubt you’re one of god’s most prized creations. You save people Michael, you save lives. Remember the first time you had called me and I yelled at you? that day I was thinking of…killing myself” Aly confessed quietly 

“but that cheerful ‘hello’ brought back a hope within me that three psychiatrists and dozens of drugs couldn’t. you’re the king of pop, the most famous man on earth and yet you call me every morning to make sure my lazy ass doesn’t get late to class” Aly chuckled softly “Michael you are everything that is right with mankind”

“is it true?” Michael asked softly

“every word of it Michael”

“no, is it true that you were going to kill yourself the day that I called you?”

“huh?”

“Aly answer me is it true?”

“this is what I’m talking about Michael” Ay cried into the phone “you’re in this insane depth of pain yourself and still you’re more concerned about whether I tried to kill myself. Michael why are you like this” Aly said gasping for breath between the sobs

“don’t cry Aly, please. Are you okay now?” Michael asked softly

“yes, I’m okay Michael. You made me okay. You have a healing capacity Michael believe it or not. The stories about you saving a cat and making a little girl walk might be false or publicity tales but the story about you saving me, helping me find myself, isn’t. the world might not know about it but that doesn’t make it not true”

“thank you, Aly,”

“no, no, Thank you Michael. Oh, by the way I forgot to tell you, I’m coming to New York tomorrow”

“really! Aly that is great news. I’m so happy” Michael replied, the excited shrill of his voice putting a smile on Aly’s face. “will you come to meet me?” 

“of course silly. I have a symposium on neuro science and the changing technology, that’ll get over by 3 and then we can meet”

“great! I’ll send a car over to the conference to bring you to Hayvenhurst, we’ll have tea with mother and then I’ll take you to L.A to meet the kids and you can stay with us”

“sounds great Michael, but I’ll be there only for a day”

“Oh, that’s sad. But no problem, after tea with mother I’ll come to drop you to the airport”

“sounds like a plan”

“I can’t wait to meet you Aly”

“me too”

“see you tomorrow”

“see you, take care of yourself Michael. Goodnight”   

“Goodnight Aly”

Michael wrapped the blanket, feeling a warmth that he hadn’t in months, and fell asleep. 

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