undeserving of you.

prologue.

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calzona's house
10:57 pm
callie's POV
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"arizona, wait!"

i grab hold of arizona's arm, but arizona isn't having it. "no! let go of me, callie! i can't stand this anymore! i can't stand arguing and arguing with you every single day, with the outcome being one of us sleeping in the bedroom and one of us sleeping on the couch. no, it just won't work like that anymore. if that's the relationship we're going to maintain, then might as well not have one at all."

arizona looks flustered, fuming, and out of breath for talking so much. "you know what. we're done. we're over. i'm so sick of this. and you. i'm sick of all of it. you can have your cheap engagement ring back." arizona angrily hurls it at me, and the only thing that keeps it from sailing out the window are my fast reflexes. "arizona, please. it doesn't have to end this way-" arizona is about to walk out the door when my words make her come to a stop. she whirls around. "you didn't just say that." "say what?" i ask, bewildered. arizona storms back towards me. "'it doesn't have to end this way?' what, you've already thought about HOW you're going to end our relationship? who even are you?" arizona hauls herself and her one suitcase out of the front door and slams it behind her.

i stare after her and the door for at least a full minute. i feel my eyelids close heavily, and i realize how tired and exhausted i am with this whole situation. my legs don't even feel connected to my body anymore as i drag myself to the couch and plop down on it. i bury my head into my hands, and cry. i stay in the same position, crying and crying for what seems like hours. 'god, what am i going to do? i have to see arizona at least once a day at work, and now that we're nothing, i have to go through the pain of seeing her and remembering everything we had which is now gone and is never coming back.' tears are still streaming down my face, but i don't feel any sadness. it's the weirdest thing ever. i just feel like, nothing. nothing at all. like there's no emotions, no more feelings inside me now that arizona has vanished. the tears finally cease, and i wipe my face off with a tissue. sighing, i realize that it's been two days since my last shower. but the again, i hate showering at night, so i'll just shower tomorrow.

i trudge up our carpeted stairs, remembering how we made out on the second step the first night we settled into this house, which obviously led to much more graphic details. i decide wisely to not look back because i will find myself staring at that same step for at least an hour. i walk into our single bedroom, which feels empty and lifeless without arizona's stuff, which occupied like half the room. i strip off my black silk top which has mascara-soaked tears now implemented in them and my denim ripped jeans. i slip into a red night gown, knowing its arizona's favorite, just to pay a little tribute before our relationship eases into nonexistence.

after brushing my teeth and brushing my wavy black hair, i climb into bed and pull the covers all the way up to my chin. i let my arms fall to my sides on the pillow and stare up at the pastel blue ceiling. that's another thing that hurts — it was arizona's idea to have a pastel colored bedroom so that no matter how sad either one of us were feeling, the colors of this room would make us feel a bit happier. my eyelids droop, and i'm glad that they do, because one more second staring at that ceiling and i might resort to crying myself to sleep tonight.

i'm just about to fall into the deepest sleep in my life before my phone pings on the nightstand. i force my eyes open and check what the ping was. it was a text from bailey, miranda bailey. what the hell is doctor bailey doing texting me at almost midnight?

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mbailey86 — i got a surprise for you in the morning. arrive at work like half an hour early. you don't want to miss it.🥳
calliopeee37 — a surprise? it better be a good one if i'm arriving thirty minutes early tomorrow morning.🤨
mbailey86 — it will be! i promise. oh, i also heard about you and arizona. terrible, awful shit. i'm sorry. you'll find someone, you and i both know it.💗
calliopeee37 — thanks, mir. i can always count on you to be there for me.
mbailey86 — of course, cals. i'll be here for you, forever and always. now, get some rest! and i'm sorry if i woke you up lol.😆
calliopeee37 — awww. truly the best. goodnight!😴💞
mbailey86 — goodnight! :)
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i shut off my phone and finally lie back down to sleep. i know it'll be hard moving on without arizona, but i can't keep on grieving over the same person for the rest of my life. i mean, there's more to life than that, right?

a/n — i hope you guys liked this chapter! it's my first calzona fan fic, so i might be a bit rusty compared to some of the expert writers out there! love u all💘

- angie <3

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