Our Last Chance

Last Night

Last Night.

I'm begging you, don't do this to me. Please! Hindi ko kakayanin.

We were standing at the rooftop of the hospital--our secret spot--over looking the city. The lights of the skyscrapers glistening like starts in the night sky. What a romantic view to enjoy with the person you love.

Kaya mo. Sabi ko sakanya. You can live without me. Just like before you even met me.

It's not that simple! He shouted out of frustration. Hindi ganon kadali na bigla nalang ako babalik sa dati! Ano yon? Parang hindi kita nakilala? Na hindi kita minahal?! That's bullshit!

Alam mong wala namang patutunguhan tong relationship na to e! Bakit ba hindi mo yon maintindihan! Sabay talikod sakanya. Ayoko na makita yung sakit sa mga mata nya.

Natahimik kaming dalawa. Ramdam na ramdam ko yung sakit na nararamdaman nya ngayon. I know, this kills me inside too. And I honestly hate myself for hurting him. Pero kung hindi ko naman to gagawin, mas masasaktan lang sya sa huli.

Do you still love me? Tanong nya sakin. Rinig ko sa boses nya na malapit na syang umiyak. I didn't answer. Inulit nya yung tanong nya. Mahal mo pa ba ako?

I do, I thought to myself. No.

I don't believe you!! Iba yang sinasabi ng bibig mo sa sinasabi ng puso mo. Rinig na rinig ko sa boses nya na umiiyak na sya.

Pinigilan ko ang sarili kong harapin sya.

Nararamdaman kong mahal mo parin ako. Mahal na mahal. Mahal na mahal din kita at gagawin ko ang lahat ng gusto mo dahil mahal kita.

Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko at humarap na ko sakanya. Isang malaking pagkakamali. I can see through his eyes how badly I'm breaking him down. Tears streaming down his face. I held back mine.

Then, I'm asking for my freedom. My voice breaks. Our freedom.

Alam mong hindi ko maibibigay sayo yan.

Why?

Dahil hindi ko kakayanin na mawala ka sa buhay ko. Unti-unti syang lumapit at lumuhod siya sa harap ko at niyakap nya ko ng mahigpit sa bewang. Ikamamatay ko pag nawala ka. So please, stop this non-sense.

Unti-unting sumikip ang dibdib ko. Unti-unti na ring dumidilim ang aking paningin. I can feel my whole body shaking and it feel like I'm about to collapse.

You stop it! I uttered weakly. Nanghihina akong pumiglas sa yakap nya. Gusto ko na ring itigil to. I want to kneel down infront of him, hug him tight, repeatedly kiss him and say sorry. Pero kailangan ko talagang gawin to. Para sa ating dalawa naman to e. So please? Let me go.

Niyakap pa nya ako ng mahigpit. No. I'll never let you go.

I cannot bare it anymore, the pain in my chest. It feels like my chest is about to explode. Every breath I take is like sulfur and its excruciatingly painful.

I was about to give up my stand in this quarrel. I was about to hug him back and kiss him. But that's when everything turned black.

TO BE CONTINUED SOON