This Is My Version; A Conor Maynard Fanfiction

Chapter 9

Olivia's POV

I've reached the end of Conor's covers in two days. Two days worth of going through short videos of a guy singing his version of the most popular tracks circling the world.

I'm obsessed, obsessed with the purity of his voice. It's almost as if he's poured his soul into those songs and it's clear just how much he's feeling them.

He's hurting, everyone is able to tell that from the way he's singing those heartbreaking songs and it hurts not being able to do something.

But then, what would I be able to do?

I sigh, closing the laptop and placing it down on the floor next to my bed. It's late but I'm still wide awake, my mind going crazy with thoughts about why I've ended up in this position.

Grabbing my phone I quickly find Chloe's contact, pressing the call button despite the time being past one in the morning.

"Livvy, you do realise it's the middle of the night right?!"

Some rustling can be heard from her side of the call and I can only assume she's in bed as well.

"I can't sleep"

I sit up against the headboard, pulling my knees up to my chest as I gaze out over London from my window where I hadn't been bothered with closing the blinds.

"Too many thoughts?"

She always seems to know without me telling her what the matter is. And many might say she is selfish and inconsiderate but she's never stopped being my friend, ever.

"I can't stop thinking of him. Am I going crazy, Chlo?"

Conor fucking Maynard. I never thought I'd say this but the man had somehow entered my heart and left with parts of me I didn't know he'd take.

But here I was, awake in the middle of the night, worried about a man that I barely know.

"Babes, don't tell me you've fallen for him?"

I sigh, biting my bottom lip.

"No"

It'd come out more unsure than I'd like it to do and it was clear that Chloe had picked up on that from the way she exhaled on the other side.

"Liv, I'm being serious. You can't be falling for him, alright?!"

"I promise you I'm not"

It still sounds far from convincing but at least she seems to be buying it this time.

To be honest am I not sure about that myself. Is it possible to fall for someone after having met them just twice?

"So why are you thinking of him then?"

She'd hit the nail right on the head with that one and to be honest I don't know. I don't know why I can't stop thinking of him. I don't know why can't seem to erase him out of my memory.

"I don't know, Chlo. That's why I'm here talking to you right now"

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the whole thing. I never thought going over to sleep with someone would end up with me not being able to sleep at night and I hate that it's gotten this far.

"You like him, don't you? You just won't admit it"

Her voice is softer this time around, almost as if she's taken a minute to put herself in my situation, something that's rare when it comes to Chloe. No, she's not selfish, just struggles with being empathetic at times.

"He's fucked up Chlo, an egoistic and selfish popstar who got his heart broken a year ago. If I'm honest am I not sure I like him, I'm just- the sex is good"

I'm ashamed for admitting it to be honest. But then he was doing the exact same thing with me. Like, he for sure isn't falling for me seeing all he can think about is his ex that clearly hadn't been anything but bad for him, something that he doesn't seem to realise.

"I get that, easy access. You're being a lazy bitch"

She chuckles quietly and I can't do anything but smile at that seeing it was nothing but the truth. Like I said, she knows me well.

"Yeah, I guess"

At least she's managed to get me into a better mood, I just wish she'd be able to help me get over my small or rather big Conor Maynard problem.

"Maybe find someone else to fuck with, I don't know, a selection might help"

I'd never had this problem before, fucking hell, I'm used to sleeping with different guys every other night and I never get attached to any of them, definitely not the heartbroken guys because that's just purely depressing.

But hey, here I was with a heart that somehow couldn't let go of just that type of guy. Someone that's more fucked up than anyone I've ever met before, someone who's gotten me into a position I'm far from comfortable in and I'm not even complaining about it.

"So you're saying I should resume the good old tinder game?"

I had kinda lost interest in the app since the whole Conor thing started, not really seeing any reason to talk to yet another fuckboy who only wants to see me on his sheets, naked underneath him.

"I don't know Liv, I just think that you should be careful not to get too attached to him, he breaks hearts and I don't want you to end up heartbroken. I care about you too much for me to let that happen"

I'm just as lost as you to be honest. How someone like Conor could break hearts is to me unclear. Plus he's literally too broken to break someone, the guy can't even take care of himself let alone hurt anyone.

"I'll be fine, Chlo, you don't have to worry"

I sigh, biting the inside of my cheek, something I'd done a lot when I was younger. It'd been an anxiety thing I'd developed as a teenager but I had actually thought I'd grown out of it years ago, something that clearly was a misconception.

"Alright, are you feeling better? Will you be able to sleep if I hang up or do you want me to stay on?"

Having her care this much was something I'm not used to. But I definitely like the change, this new Chloe is welcome to stay.

"I'll manage, thank you for offering though and thanks for listening, it means a lot"

And after that we hang up, my mind more muddled than before and I'm definitely nowhere near tired enough to fall asleep.

I lay back down, pulling the duvet up to my chin hoping it'd make it easier for me to fall asleep, something that never really has been a problem for me before.

Yet just as I'm about to close my eyes does my phone start to vibrate on my bedside table, the name of the person I've bee trying to forget about clear on the screen.