Life as Peter Parker

A Safe Spider

I'm so, so sorry. It's been so long...

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Peter sighed as he flopped onto his bed. He was getting really sick of this whole 'Corona Virus' thing. One the one hand, he loved not having to go to school. The people there were annoying. On the other hand though....it really sucked. Like, really really sucked. He missed being able to be in contact with people other than his aunt and the occasional cashier when he had to make grocery runs.

Sure, he didn't have a lot of friends, but being in quarantine was boring. Peter was a people person. Don't get him wrong, he liked his personal time, but he also loved being around people. Peter did spend his free time helping others, after all. But out of costume, he loved walking through the streets soaking up the energies radiating off of his fellow New Yorkers. The city was always just so...alive. And he missed it.

There was one thing worse than quarantine though.

And it was the idiots dumb enough to still commit crimes.

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Peter stared down from his perch on the ledge of a roof incredulously. A few yards below him, were two men. And not two guys who were there out of necessity. No, these two men were trying to steal a car. A car. The idiots would get caught so fast it, wasn't even funny.

Peter sighed as one of them got ready to smash in the driver side window. "Ya'know," he started, "that doesn't look like proper social-distancing." Both men jumped at the sudden voice and whirled around to look for him.

Peter shook his head. They never looked up. Idiots. One would have thought that, by now, criminals would have learned to look up.

After a few moments of spinning in circles, Peter took pity on the two men and flipped down into the alley, a few feet away from them. As soon as he moved, their eyes locked onto him.

"What's up?" Peter asked with a small wave. Their eyes widened, and they took a few steps back. "Oh, so now you want to social distance?" He asked rhetorically.

Peter crossed his arms and shook his head at their bewildered expressions. "I know that you guys are dumb, considering you're trying to jack a car, but how stupid are you two? I mean, we're in the middle of a pandemic here and you two are wearing bandanas? That's not gonna do much for you."

Before either of them could respond, Peter webbed them to the car they were trying to steal. "Well, I get that a bandana might be your best option, but you could at least layer them up. Be considerate! Jeez." Peter scolded as he dialed the police. After he hung up, Peter swung away, shaking his head and muttering to himself at the stupidity of some people.

After Peter finished his rounds, he swung to a secluded alley near his apartment and changed out of his suit. He balled it up and stuck it in a plastic bag. He might be immune to diseases and viruses, but his aunt wasn't. After he got changed, Peter put on a homemade mask (to keep up appearances) and walked home.

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👞

"Hey honey. How was patrol today?" May called from the kitchen as Peter walked in. "The usual. Stopped two idiots in bandanas from stealing a car," he replied.

May looked up from her puzzle and frowned. "Bandanas? Please tell me they at least layered." Peter shook his head. "Nope. Just one bandana each. And they weren't distancing from each other, or even wearing gloves." May tsk'ed and turned back to the puzzle. "They could at least pretend they cared about other people." She muttered. Peter shrugged. "I'm gonna go do my Spanish assignment. I'll make some dinner later." May just nodded and waved without looking up.

Peter shook his head. Man. Was this time in history bizarre or what?

)1$-$&-$/92'jaosjslshoahs

Ok so I'm looking through these old drafts and there are so many that are either finished or super close that I just...didn't post.

This is one of those. So if there's like some part to this story that I just...didn't finish...don't blame me. I honestly didn't even bother to read through it again. I wrote this DURING covid besties. Like oml

Let me ask you guys something...

How...the actual fuck....does gh make an f sound??

Like...tough?? How?????

Oh well.

Until next time lmao...