I find myself spinning uncontrollably. As if, as if I could fly or something, alone in my mind. I don't even know if it's my mind anymore- so many tricks are being played on me. Is a mind as cruel as to do that? The answer is yes. My mind is so cruel, it teases me and makes me believe that I am actually special. Well, I'm not. I continue spinning, unaware of how dizzy I actually was, and end up passing out, blank, worthless, gone, in a coma... No one even really cared, I guess I couldn't blame them, they weren't even there anyway.
I awake, I am panting, breathing so hard that my lungs may as well just burst out of my chest in that moment. I look around, wondering, I had no idea where I was or who I even was at that moment. What day was it? What time was it- was it Friday yet? Could I stay home and act all alone, even though all my friends would be out while I sit here, writing this story? No. Turns out I wasn't alone, and it wasn't Friday. I saw that boy, just standing there, alone with me.
He looks at me with this, gentle smile of his. It disgusts me. What was he so happy about? There wasn't anything inparticular in that moment to be happy about- I had just woken up, sweating and panting as if I had a horrible dream, which I did. Though this ignorant boy, he just kept staring at me! What was it? Was something on my face? Did I have stains, or any other unquestionable things, that I shouldn't even be talking about? No- this boy was important to me in some way. I could feel it in my bones.
This boy, yeah, he's special alright. It turns out he was my beloved, my iadala. As soon as I realize this, my troubles ceased, and instantly was I mesmerized by his presence. His soothing presence, he just looked at me, and I looked at him back, his tender eyes meeting mine with such passion, such lust, such envy. Did he want me? It wasn't hard to tell- though I couldn't be certain, no, for there was another girl there, too. She looked at the two of us menacingly, and I stare at her, her porcelain skin eagerly making it's way to the small light of the room, little to no light even resided in that moment.
I look back to the boy, his still tender eyes meeting mine, that same passion that made me melt then and there. What was wrong with me? I had just woken up from a dizzy dream- wake to this fine boy here in front of me. Ah- yes, his abs, I could see them, they rippled through his shirt, made me want to rip it off- sorry, no- stupid hormones!
My gaze didn't falter until the obviously envious girl came back, sitting by us, nearer to my beloved rather than to me. In that moment I realized I was laying on the cold ground, my beloved crouched in front of me. The girl, smirking at me, gave a little laugh. What was wrong with her? Why was she laughing? And why did I seem so unrelated to it?
My beloved just smiled at her, and almost instantly, envy clutched at my heart. He was mine! And why did this girl feel the need to take my beloved away from me? It didn't make sense- was this girl just some player, and she was playing with my emotions, my heartstrings? Obviusly not, for in that moment she fell into his arms, and placed a tender kiss on his lips, his plush lips, absorbed into her's in such a way that instantly wanted to make me cry.
My beloved seemed to be enjoying it, for he pressed against her lips with such passion, such joy, and I just wanted to split them apart right then and there, kissing my beloved myself, for I craved his lips even more than that filthy girl. What was wrong with her? She must not have known of our relations.
They continue to share a passionate kiss, me, just there, watching them intently, the girl pulled away for a minute, looking at me slightly, that obvious smirk plastered on her hideous face. Please kill her if you must, dear reader! For she looked at me in such a way that caused my struggles, my pain. How weary I grew. She then looked to my beloved, a soft smile on her face as she looked to him, a soft,
"One more?"
And they did it again, enough to cause my departure.
