10 Days (Jumin Han x Reader) COMPLETED

Day 3

Three years old.

That was how old you'd been when you first woke screaming. It was still weeks before you'd been adopted, and the fellow toddlers in the orphanage had been speaking of monsters and other terrifying creatures that lurked in the dark.

Your mind had thought them real, and had brought them to life in your dreams. You could recall hundreds of instances after that point where you'd been woken by the shrillness of your own screams.

Once you joined the (L/N) residence, your nightmares had continued, but you quickly learned to be silent in your terror, for fear of waking your mother. You'd thought that you had adequate control of your body to be able to stop yourself from calling out in slumber, but clearly, that sense of control had weakened.

But why, of all nights for me to wake up screaming, did it have to be tonight? You ask yourself, unable to move or speak as you stare into the steely eyes of Jumin. You swallow, noting how—for the first time—his face is contorted into worry as he gazes down at you, not a trace of anger or resentment in his fine features.

"(Y/N)," He repeats. "Are you okay?"

You want to escape the situation. To be gone. Dead. Anywhere but here.

You want to pretend that you haven't just woken the entire building with your desperate scream in the dead of night, to pretend that the memory of the nightmare isn't intensifying the tremble in your lower lip.

You feel a lump in your throat build when your mind thinks back to the vividity of the dream, of Chairman Han's touch as he kissed you on your marriage day and put the final stamp on your fate, and all you can do to maintain your facade is force the memory from your mind.

You already know that if you say a word, the tears will spill and you'll be left even further humiliated in front of Jumin, so you wordlessly nod to answer his question.

"Did you...have a nightmare?"

His voice is so soft and tender. It's as if he knows.

"What was it about?" He inquires gently. His words come out slowly, as if you're a child.

"Monsters," You respond instantly, thinking back to what your childhood nightmares had always been about. You said it as a lie, but only now do you realize that your dream truly had been about monsters: three of them. Your mother, who forced you into this marriage. Chairman Han, who was innocently unaware and going through with it. And perhaps worst of all, you.

You feel tears spill from your eyes and you give up holding them back any longer.

"I'm a monster, Jumin," You confess to him, staring at the ceiling, looking up. Up toward where you had been taught that a god was watching over you, your words a confession to Him. You drop your gaze to the floor and close your eyes, sobbing. "I'm such a monster."

You don't recognize when, but Elizabeth soon crawls her way onto the bed and paws at your lap, not understanding the reason for your trembling shoulders. Even she, a mere cat, can tell that something is wrong with you. But it's hopeless.

Because she can do nothing to ease your pain.

Your mother has already decided for you: your future is with Chairman Han.

And the one luxury you don't have is disobeying your mother.

More tears spill, and after that point they just keep on coming. You sob silently, cradling Elizabeth in your arms, wishing that she could make the pain go away. It's the first time you've allowed yourself to cry since learning of the engagement—you've held strong on other nights—but after your nightmare, it's too much.