"That's a good headline. Very catchy."
"These small towns don't have much else to write 'bout."
"Mm, no, they don't. I can't believe I used to live here."
"'Paruntly, neither can th' town."
"Yeah...So what should I do next?"
"Extreme Skiing?"
"No, no. I already did that, remember? I hiked up that blasted mountain with less food than I should have brought in that horrid yellow rucksack. Then you all airlifted my favourite red skis to me. That was fun. Good mountain."
" Oh, yeh. 'Ow 'bout, er, I dunno. Bug eatin' or somthin'?'
"...Perfect."
________________________________________________________________________
The light shone off the reflective back of the silver beetle. It was one if many in the damp rain forest, clinging to a red leaf that grew in abundance.
The tines of the leaf swept at the bugs underside as it crawled to one of the holes to eat.
"Perfect!"
A voice, something the bug had never heard, startled it. It backed slowly away from the hole in the leaf, while shadows descended into the bug's vision and great pink things picked it up. It squirmed, trying to get away.
"Look, Nathan! This bug is absolutely perfect! I want fifty, no, a hundred of these collected. We're doing a one night show on Vegas, and it's gonna be huge!!"
"On it, Simon."
The great pink things had kept a hold of the bug while it heard noises coming from the shadows. The strange garbled nonsense gave the bug the chills, making it squirm harder.
The great pink things slowly lowered it onto the red leaf it had occupied earlier. The bug was so elated, it scurried away from the leaf, onto another green one, and straight into an invisible block.
The bug threw itself at the block, trying desperately to either break through or climb it. The bug heard a chilling sound from the shadows, which made it frantic, scrambling for purchase on the smooth barrier keeping it from the rest of the forest.
"I like this one. I think I am going to eat it first."
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The stage was set.
Bedazzled jewels and glitter proclaimed, "Simon Beckett: Most Extreme Man". Two giant silver beetles shone with sequins, one on each side of the jewelled and glittered sign. A huge red drape hung before the large audience, keeping them from seeing anything before the show started.
"Full house."
The man himself stood centre stage, adjusting the black sequin tie that was bold upon his white shirt and white tuxedo.
A box to his left containing ninety-nine silver beetles crawling over each other, fighting to get out. Directly in front of him was a small enclosure containing a single beetle on a red leaf, unmoving.
"Nathan, check this beetle while I check the microphone. Is it even still alive?"
A portly man with a bulbous nose gave the enclosure a good rattling while Simon Beckett blew into the microphone, causing the audience to groan at the sound.
"It's alive,Simon."
"Good, mic. works too."
The stage manager called over, "Showtime!"
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"Ladies and gentlemen! Children of all ages! What you are about to see will push your mental state to the very edge, defy everything you knew. What you are about to see is the Most Extreme Man eat beetles!"
The reaction from the crowd was mixed as the curtain opened upon Simon centre stage, lone beetle in the palm of his hand.
"And now," he said into the microphone, flashing a grin. "A demonstration."
The man's ever-so-slightly podgy fingers clamped on one of the beetles legs, causing it to kick up a commotion. The beetle, sensing it's eminent demise, summoned up it's last defence as it slid down Simon Beckett's throat into his stomach.
Simon spread his arms wide, like an Olympian who had just landed the jump. The crowd went wild, as his stomach started churning.
Simon Beckett's smile never wavered as he gave a small, hacking cough, then fell over dead.
