The words were engraved into my mind. I can't say my dad is 100% responsible for all my shit today but I'm not saying he was perfect. My mom wasn't also a saint. We shouldn't expect our parents to be perfect or angels. They also shouldn't be our best friends, because friends lie and cheat and that's something family should never do. My mom wasn't a drug addict or anything that shitty. She was just there, and by there I mean, in the background. Never saying or doing anything. Never saying anything when I lost 30 lbs In 2 months when I was already underweight. Never saying anything as she viewed the cuts on my arms. Never saying anything when I oded on sleeping pills. At first I respected this silence. How she didn't interfere with my agenda. How she did nothing and simply ignored me. So there it is. I had a fucked up childhood. Yay! Where is my participation award?? Haha, no. I don't get one, we don't get one, you don't, no one does. We don't get our own fucking participation award because living through it and surviving it is already enough of a god damning award.
