A letter folded into a heart.
An afternoon with my heart pounding,
Whispers flitting through my friends room like doves.
A night spent on the edge of a cliff,
Struggling to breath.
A morning spent clawing up from that cliff's edge,
Dragging myself along the rocks.
An hour,
Spent burning up,
Waiting and feeling as if I'd puke.
A lunch spent not eating,
But shaking in someone's arms that I would have settled for if you'd just told her earlier.
A class spent looking at you,
Wishing you'd look toward me.
Days spent waiting for that look.
Minutes spent crying on someone's lap after leaving another to open my heart for you.
Seconds spent unable to breath,
Screaming as you left that heart in pieces.
Days spent avoiding friends and family,
Never letting your name fall from my lips.
A year spent in pain,
Tears still falling as I fill a page with words you will never read.
Unlike that letter,
I cannot fold this into a heart,
And you will never see this.
I cannot spend days waiting for your reaction.
I cannot spend ages dwelling on rejection again.
I am sorry for pulling you into my life again.
I love you more than you'll ever believe.
Sorry for making another world centered around you.
Sorry for making a fragment of me that would act like you.
Sorry for taking your place in the music program,
Goofing off instead of working and being popular,
It was not a concious choice.
Sorry for listening to your songs still,
But your voice is still one of the only ways to put me to sleep.
I will always love you.
And for that,
I will always be sorry.
YOU ARE READING
Key To My Heart
PoesíaThis isn't for anyone that will ever see it or acknowledge my existence. It's for two boys I've loved and lost, without the grim reaper touching them. I'm sorry for anyone who reads this. I love you all. P
