Gold, Fire & Refinement

Chapter Forty-Three

"Hope is a waking dream." ~Aristotle

Eva Pearl got on the road early the next morning after spending the night in Dallas. The truth was finally sinking in. Frank was gone and she was free. That night when he beat her to within an inch of her life, just when she thought the next blow he delivered would be the one that killed her, he stopped. It wasn't until later she realized why. He stopped because of the blood he saw gushing from her. She'd started bleeding a lot and he got scared and took her to the hospital. All while driving, he threatened her as he told her exactly what to say to the nurses and doctors in the ER. Said he would kill her if she didn't say what he wanted, and, at the same time, he promised never to hit her again. That told her his promise was insincere. He reneged on it many times in later weeks, but after that night, she never talked to him again about anything important. Nothing like the fact that the night she almost bled to death, she was pregnant. She had found out a month earlier and was trying to leave him so she could have her baby without him. Especially since she knew it wasn't his baby.

That night, after catching her in her second attempt to leave, he got angrier than ever before. When he caught her during her first attempt, she promised she wouldn't try to do it again. That's why the night of her second attempt, after drowning his sorrows in alcohol, he thought he had to do something to make her stop trying to leave. So he beat and kicked her and her unborn child unmercifully, leaving her with a very bruised and aching stomach, along with arms, legs, back, and sides—and no baby. Until that night, he had never beaten her so badly. He had verbally abused her and had even hit her, but until that night, he had not beaten her like he was trying to kill her.

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Fear still gripped at her insides when she thought about what might be waiting for her at home. Frank always told her that because of her "profession," he was the only one who would ever truly love her. Her family would always be ashamed of her, he said, because of what she did for a living. That's why what happened seemed too good to be happening to her. 

But now she knew Frank was lying. What she couldn't figure out was why she ever believed him. Her family believed in her, and her sister had already offered her a chance for a whole new life. In just a year, she'd have her bachelor's degree in business. She already had her freedom, and now it was possible she'd soon have things she always dreamed of having. A real life with a chance for a real future. Still. It frightened her. She hadn't been part of her family for a decade, and her brothers hadn't talked to her in years. In real estate, they had already started building a new business development in Mississippi. Now their successful real estate development firm was buying some of her mother's property, hundreds of acres of land. After research and planning, they were building a rural farming cooperative, charter schools, housing developments, apartments, and a retirement village, and Josie was building a beverage manufacturing plant. They were going to be providing jobs, training for business ownership, and futures for black people in and beyond Mississippi. Their plans were underway long before they heard The Keepers' story, but once they heard it, her brothers wanted their development to become part of The Keepers' dreams. If she accepted the job Josie offered her, she would be using her business savvy to manage fundraising for the development projects. She would work closely with her brothers, EZ and Daniel, Jr. She wasn't sure she was ready for so much responsibility, but after she told Josie she was on her way home, her sister started talking to their brothers and making plans. "You've proven you're a business genius," Josie said. "You helped that white man build a smut empire. You did most of the work and got nothing for it. Now it's time for you to use your brains to help yourself. For a change."

With home just hours away, she was trying to calm her nerves. Driving with the top down made it hard for her to hear the radio, so she was glad she remembered to bring along her MP3 player and earphones. Listening to one of her favorite songs from the "church music" her sister sent to her over the years, she paid close attention as singer Deitrick Haddon started singing his gospel hit, "A Sinner's Prayer." Feeling as though the lyrics were speaking directly to her, before long, she started crying so much, she had to exit I-20 East to dry her eyes. The lyrics had dug into her soul deeply, making her want to talk to God, so, after stopping the car, she prayed. She asked God to help her figure out how to leave on the highway all the shame she was feeling in her heart, and all the shame she had brought upon herself, and her family for so many years.