Olivia POV
I'm with miss Beetle. I'm struggling to be around Harvey anymore. It's not that I don't like him. That's the problem really. I like him too much. I don't know if I'm ready to like someone again and liking my boy best friend that's just a recipe for rejection. So I'm with miss beetle . She's trying to calm me down. But nothing is working. Nothing at all. I feel like the only person that can is Harvey. I'm relying too much on Harvey. I need to get away from him. I'm not going to go to the party tonight. He probably won't even notice. Rachel is going to be there. It is clear they like each other. Everyone at school knows it as well. I wouldn't even have a chance. It's decided. I'm not going.
'Are you even listening to me Olivia"
"Yeah I am a bit" I mumbled
"You have to tell him how you feel. And you have to go to that party. No matter what"
"I will miss . I will"
I was lying to myself and I was lying to her.
"Just sing for now Olivia. I know your doctor said it was bad for you but that helps"
Teachers think I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks but I won't go to the doctor to see. I have a pass that allows me out of lesson when things get too much for me. It's meant to be for 30 minutes but I tend to skip the whole lesson. I can't help it. I hope Harvey will have a good time at the party. It's for the best I stay at home. I just know it. My instinct is never wrong. Except all the times it has been. Like with Max. But that doesn't matter. I'm right now. That's all that matters. I'm not going to the party.
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After school
4:00pm
The party starts in an hour and a half. I still need to tell lily I'm not going so she doesn't have to come round and help me get ready. Ok it's too late. I just got a message from lily. She's outside more house. How am I going to get out of going to the party now.
" you are going to the party I don't care what you say"
"I'm not going lily. I can't"
"Why? Harvey is going to be there and there is a surprise later on in the night"
I sigh and look down
"Oh it's because of Harvey you don't want to go" she realises
"Yeah" I reply
"Did you have an argument. You were fine with each other this morning"
"No we didn't have an argument lily"
"Then why Olivia"
"I'm scared"
"Scared?"
"I'm scared he's just going to go off with Rachel and leave me. Just like Max left me"
"Oh that's never going to happen Olivia. Harvey really cares for you. I got sent out of maths today and sent to your class. He kept trying to get out of it. I'm assuming it was to go and find you"
"Really?"
"Yeah"
"Fine I'll go to the party then lily but we only have an hour to get ready now"
"We really spent 30 minutes arguing about going to a party"
"Yeah" I laughed.
I don't really want to go to the party but I can't let my friends down. Not after all they have done for me. I'm going to the party. Wether I like it or not.
