Boredom Ensues

To My First Enemy.

I would like to say goodbye. This is really it, huh? An end to something I didn't think would end so soon... and yet has arrived already.

Goodbye...

Or you'd like that, eh? Sorry, bud, but I'm not the "short and sweet" kind of guy. This wouldn't be my style of chapter if it was only a few lines. I am going to make this long, painful, and I shall explain everything that you and your simple-minded ways have hurt so many people. I am so fucking happy that I won't have to see you again. If you don't know why, then I'll explain. Oh, and trust me...

This is gonna be a long fucking chapter.

So, I guess I'll start with what we finished with, as that will be the main focus. I have to ask something, friend... Do you think you're alone? Do you think you're special? Unique? Different? If you answered yes, I'll let you in on a little secret:

You're not. You never have been and never will be. Never before in my life have I felt so fucking ashamed and betrayed by one person. You lie and try to hide behind these masks, but I am here to shatter every single one.

You're a manipulative, psychotic, lying little piece of shit. I trusted you, I believed in you, and you used me and my own achievements to make your own life seem amazing. I hid in my own shadow that you cast upon me because I was too afraid to stand up against you. Well guess what? I'm climbing out.

You put people in danger. How can you not see that? This entire situation of isolation is for our benefit and you think you're above that?? You think this doesn't apply to you? Infections are high and you think this is a good time to put other people's lives at stake just because you want to fuck someone? You're selfish. Perhaps I should enlighten you about how diseases spread, how one person can lead to five, then fifteen, then hundreds. You'll be fined and jailed if I even hear anymore thoughts about breaking that code.

Haha, oh wait, you always break codes. You always lie. Why should I trust your word now? You lied to everyone who knew me, telling them that I was better because of you, that I improved because of you. I didn't need you for any of my choices, for any of my actions. The only lesson I learnt from you after all these years is not to trust you. The only observation I made with you is that anything I do you'll use and manipulate into your benefit.

And the thing is you're not even that smart! In fact, I'm embarrassed that this happened to me, because you're such an idiot that I shouldn't have let this happen! But then again, you use your strength to your advantage; threatening anyone who challenges you. Next time I hear a threat, go through with it. Trust me when I say I will not back down. Trust me when I say that if you do make any more remarks to me or my love I will make sure your lips are permanently sealed. You will suffer pain beyond your comprehension, that I can promise you.

Now, how about our recent event? My love, the person you fucked with that led to me getting her. I guess I have to say thanks, as at least now I know she's safe, and not about to be pressured into sex every other weekend. At least I know that I was better than you, and saved someone from your clutches. You could've left it there, you know? We were all yelling at you for being an idiot. We were all telling you how stupid you were, but then you attack the person you've already shattered?

I have spent months trying to fix her. I have spent every day since I met her trying to repair her from the mess you made her, and you've destroyed every little bit of progress I have made. You did all that because you singled her out, you went for her, ignoring the big picture like you always do. At least she has people to back her up. At least she has people on her side. She has me, and I have hundreds upon hundreds of contacts. Choose your battles, as otherwise they might be your last. Next time, if there even is a next time, I expect you to keep your mouth shut when around her. If you somehow do have any complaints about how your sex-crazed mind scared her away, then bring them to me, and I'll tell you where to buy a sex-doll you lunatic.

Oh, and something personal. How, fucking, Dare you say that I don't need to worry anymore because my "exams" are done. I have no fucking clue what my grade will be, I need to keep learning and learning for something I might not even reach. I have to rely on nothing but my own hopes that I've gotten what I need. You can still learn, and you can still get what you need through work. I don't. Many of us don't.

You want to talk about stress? Tell me, what does stressed mean to you? Does it mean how every day you're constantly thinking it's your last, and that you have to make it count? How you can never escape the fact that you didn't even get to work for your grade, and now have to rely on subjective judgement? How you have to come home to a broken family with a depressed soon-to-be step dad, an emotional and frightened sister, and an over-worked yet underpaid mother? How you do everything you can to make your friends happy, and yet never know if you've done enough? Have you been so stressed, that you have had a panic attack, unable to breathe, damaging your skin and flesh, the only word that you can audibly say being "Sorry" as you hurt yourself and sit in the corner alone and yet suffocated?

I have, and I believe you remember that night... What was it you said again? Oh, right: "Let his dad deal with it" "He'll get over it" "Leave him alone". You said that to the one person who was helping me, all because you couldn't differentiate from your dick and your brain.

Oh, and let me tell you something: As my family is constantly at the brink of falling apart (and how my dad is a bipolar alcoholic), I recommend never giving that advice to me again.

We all miss people, so how about you get your head out of the sand and realise that you're not some sort of special emo anime character, and that people around you have worse shit going on. I used to want to help you, but now that you've gone and said all of that shit...

I'm done helping you, prick. Next time I see you I won't even acknowledge your existence. You thought you'd get the last word? I'd never let that happen. This is the final page, the end of it all.

I'll see you in hell.