Jorge Joestar (Light Novel)

Chapter 15: Beyond

Lying half-dead on a back country road in Japan, the exact thing I needed to happen happened. When I woke up, the flesh from my back and ass was back in place, and the fracture in my skull was healed up. I was sleeping in a large bed surrounded by white walls and almost no other furniture, and a freckled young man sitting next to the bed said, in Italian,

"Oh! You're awake, Jorge Joestar."

?

"How do you know my name?"

I asked, also in Italian, a fact that took me by surprise. How come I spoke Italian now?

"Ha ha ha! The Japanese man who lives here has quite a useful ability. He made it so everyone coming in and out of here can speak English and Italian and Japanese. Including you!"

"............? The hell does that mean...? Where is this? Japan?"

"Japan. Morioh! My name is Vinegar Doppio. But I wasn't the one who saved you, that was my boss. Hang on,"

he said, and reached out for a book lying on the side table. There was a bizarre picture of a boy on the cover, and the book's title was Pink Dark Boy: Part 8. Volume 112. It was just a bit too large to comfortably hold in the palm of his hand, so Doppio curled it a bit, and held it to his ear. Then he pursed up his lips and began humming a weird little song,

"Tomememememem ♪ tomemememememem ♪"

and proceeded to ignore me entirely, staring at nothing in particular and yet speaking to someone who wasn't even there.

"Oh, hello! This is Doppio. Joestar's awake! ...yes, got it."

Then he looked at me.

"Yo."

"...........?"

"Think you can get up?"

I wasn't sure, but I pushed the duvet back and lowered my legs to the floor. I was still dressed for my wedding, oh god, but I didn't think mentioning that would be much use, and all I could manage was a groan as pain shot through me. My ass and back felt like they were going to rip apart, and my head felt like there was a wooden stake jammed through it.

"Seems to be in a lot of pain."

He was calmly reporting the facts to some unseen individual, and it hurt enough I really wanted

to punch the little guy for it.

"If you keep moving you'll get used to it. Come on."

"No, I can't!"

It hurt so much every part of my face was trying to go a different direction.

"Hey."

"Hunh?"

"Who do you think you're fucking with?"

he snarled, but my eyelids were twitching violently and I couldn't even get a good look at his face.

"What...?"

"I'm a fucking gangster, buddy. Pick your words and your answers carefully, got it?"

Doppio pulled his shirt up and showed me the gun jammed in the trousers, and I instantly felt far better. I mean, there was no reason to hold back now!

"Don't think I won't use this just cause you're injured!"

he said, and tried to lower his shirt, but I grabbed his wrist, snatched the gun with my other hand and smashed the grip up under his chin. Call yourself a gangster? You're like what, fifteen? Sixteen? I'd been shot down by the Germans twice, crashed landed and survived in a god damn hornet's nest so get fucking real. Doppio curled up, clutching his jaw, and I put the barrel of the gun to the back of his head.