its a love story baby just say yessss.

chapter uno (one in italian, for illiterates)

 Savannah had always been a fan of satanism. She is called a witch. She brews potions in her toilet seat and cuts up hamster heads to satisfy herself. She rubs olive oil on her back. Hmmmmm she thought I love italiano stuff. People were scared of Savannah, most of the time, whenever she wasn't sharpening her fangs. She was a vampire by night, but she had always lacked a sense of Lovvveee. 

 Anyway, she got up from her home ,the curb on the street, and looted an innocent poor old woman by shoving her stick up somewhere and giving her corona. The woman died after 69 seconds.

savannnah strolled into the grocery store and picked up avocados. As she sniffed the avocado, she realized it was Billie eilish's head. Startled, she jumped back " BILLOIEEEEE" ! she screamed. She then proceeded to dance the cotton eyed joe dance to impress her idol. As she was dancing, she accidentally kicked  what seemed like flesh. uh OH she thought. She swung her bald head around to see a person with very nice build fallen on the slimy floor. She couldn't help but stare at the person;s back. She would've loovveedd to rub some olive oil on that humpback. The boy's head turned around, and his face was seen. Savannnah GASPed. He looked like Percy Jackson! 

The boy's face was mere perfection. It was of a utopian land where citizens were as pure as one could get(not in the nazi way, but still). Savannah offered the perfect man a smelly hand. His green eyes wandered over to her non-existent chest, and then toward the outsrtecched hand. When their fingers touched, sparks and butterflies flew from the collaboration. one butterfly bit Savannah's eyeball, and she asked the man how much do you weigh"? Surprised but not amused at the question, he replied My name is Luciani. Savannah giggled. OH No. She forgot about Billie! Billie eyelash now turned into a squid and started squirting her ink on Savannah's friend, Nadia. Elizabeth, her other friend was in the fish section. Which reminded Savannha to spread her legs, and the stanky and fishy but marvelous stench of her buttocks reached lUciani's perfectly structured nose.

He was in a trance. He realized he had fallen in love with Savannah, and he didn't care about his responsibilities in the mafia. he turned to savannah He confided with a glimmering shine in his eyes, "Will you be the princess of my Italian Ku Klux Clan?". Savannah, as sure as ever, plucked anothr butterfly out of her rectum and handed it to Luciano, who butchered it and turned it into a diamond ring. 

~The Wedding~

Savannah stood proudly on her dressing podium. She smiled at herself in the mirror. What do you thunk? she asked her bridesmaids. Elizabth cringed at the sight. Savannah wanted the wedding to be Adam and Eve- style, so the bride and groom were both naked, except for leaves covering their smelly genitals. 'How rude!', replied Elizabth. Thta's the only phrase  Elizabth was capable of vocalizing, sort of like Groot. Elizabeth is Groot. Loch Ness, Savannah's mermaid friend loved the idea of the biblical wedding, even though Savannah was a satanist and had conjured Lucif*r( her best friend) millions of times before . Elizabth was jealous that Savannah got married before her, so she snagged a kiss from Luciani before the rehearsal dinner. Nadia, the supreme goddess was supposed to be the priest for the wedding. "here comes the witch" started playing and Savnnah walked down the squid ink-filled aisle all alone (because she was a lonely person who watched Neatflicks all day). Billie Eyelash had juiced herself for Savnnah's wedding. Luciani stood at the altar, with nothing but pride in his eyes. Before the ceremony could begin, Elizabth sprung onto the altar and displayed a variety of karate moves. Then, with a fierce face, she jumped onto Luciani's lap and Screamed 'MINE! " ! She then wrapped her tentacles around his face and made him write a Wattpad erotica story of them two. Nadia pushed Elizabeth the octopus off her soulmate and - BAM! Elizabth stamped on nadia's head. And Nadia was now dead. During this all, Savannah was sad. She lost her only chance at love ,oh yeah, and her goddess of a friend had died.

 And just then, Loch Ness arised from the bar, after having too many margaritas, she scratched Savnnah's teeth and gave her a deep meaningful kiss. "I love you and i always have", she muttered under steamy breath. Savannag kissed back. Loch Ness then plugged her USB into savnnah's hairless head and showed her a PPT (YES, ITS A *PPT*) of all the times Loch NEss had almost told Savannah she loved her. One moment was in school, they were all 14 and Nadia had spilled water on Loch Ness, and had gotten in trouble for it. While Nadia was being scolded by the teacher, Loch NEss glanced over at savannah, whose eyes were filled with tears, because she was laughing too hard at Loch ness being drenched. Loch Ness did a Wakandan worship of Savannnah everyday at home.

Loch Ness married Savnnah .