To Save A Life

Two

Sorry for the long wait between chapters, I wanted to make this chapter as good as possible and life got in the way. I hope you enjoy this chapter :)
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"If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them." -James O'Barr

Chris
March 31, 1995

   He can't breathe. His mind is racing and he can't think about anything other than Selena and the baby. How could this have happened? He had just talked to her an hour ago. His dad drives because Chris doesn't want to believe that they're hurt. He was told that she had been shot. Shot? He hadn't expected that. He had expected a car accident or that she was in labor, but this? This wasn't possible, Yolanda couldn't have done this. She had loved Selena almost more than any other fan, if she had really loved her, she wouldn't have hurt her.
  Please let them be okay. Let them be okay, he prayed. He didn't really pray all that much but he'd start more if both of them pulled through. He practically jumped out of the car the minute his dad parked.

    Chris knew the minute he had looked at Abraham. He had never seen the older man cry before. Normally stoic, Abraham's eyes were bloodshot, his body hunched over in gut-wrenching sobs. Selena couldn't be dead. They were going to have a baby. Chris met Suzette's gaze as she gently shook her head no. She catches him before he crumples to the floor and they sob in each other's arms.

    A dark-haired doctor entered the room and looked around briefly before heading toward them. She introduced herself as one of the doctors who had worked on Selena and their baby. Though she appeared calm, her voice trembled as she described what had happened in the operating room and that they had managed to save his son.
    Alive. Their son was alive. Chris should have felt relieved at the doctor's words but instead, he felt numb. It just didn't seem fair that their son was alive and Selena wasn't here to see him. How did that saying go? People plan and God laughs. He would say that God has a sick sense of humor but there is no God because no God would do this.

The doctor asks if he'd like to go see his son and he doesn't know what to do. Chris looked helplessly at the Quintanillas, who were just as stunned as he was. It was Marcella who broke the silence and told him that it's okay and that she'd like to see her grandson. They trail behind him wordlessly as the doctor led them to the nursery and pointed out a baby boy swaddled in a blanket with a blue cap on his tiny head. He seemed to be the only baby that wasn't surrounded by family. Chris couldn't help but look at the mothers holding their babies and realized that Selena would never hold hers, she wouldn't have the experiences that she dreamed about.

The doctor tells him that he could go see his son whenever he was ready. Ready? Chris doubted that he would ever be ready for this, not without Selena. He turned toward Selena's father, "I don't know how to— I can't do this on my own. We were supposed to do this together and now it's just me... I don't know what I should do. What do I do?"
Abraham paused for a minute before saying, "You should go meet him. If—if it was her, I'd already be gone."
Chris murmurs "Me too," before pushing open the door to the nursery and sitting in the chair by his son's bed.
A nurse placed their son in his arms and he's afraid he might drop him. Selena would have called him perfect and all he wanted right now, more than anything else in the world is for her to be here with them.
"Hey there little guy, I guess I'm your dad... I don't know how good I'll be without your mommy here but I'm gonna try." Chris pushed back the tiny cap to reveal a head full of black hair that was already starting to curl. "You've got my hair huh? There's not much we can do about that I'm afraid," he ran a hand over his son's hair before continuing.
"We really should've decided on your name sooner but we just couldn't agree. Your mom liked all of these long, fancy-sounding names but I- I told her that the poor kid's never going to be able to fit his name on anything."

He swears he's going crazy because he heard Selena's voice whisper a name for their baby boy. Mateo Christopher Pérez. Mateo was a name that his mom suggested when he and Selena couldn't decide. Selena had insisted on Christopher for his middle name after she'd heard that it was somewhat of a family tradition to have the firstborn son's middle name be their father's first name.

She looked so beautiful even in death. Chris couldn't believe that he had to say goodbye to Selena. They were alone and everything he wanted to say came pouring out of him, he told her everything about their little boy and how he'd finally picked a name for him.
"I'm going to tell him every day about you so he won't ever forget," he brushed away a stray curl from her face. "I don't know what I'm going to do without you but I'll figure it out. I-I know you have to go and it's okay. You go, Mateo and I will be fine, I promise. I love you, I'll always be in love with you." He slipped her wedding ring back on her finger, taking one last look before he closed the lid, memorizing every last detail of her face. He wanted to go with her, just lie next to her and close the lid but he knew that she'd never forgive him for leaving Mateo.

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   Chris couldn't believe that it had been almost a year since Selena died. 1995 had been a hell of a year with the trial and everything surrounding it. He didn't care what happened to Yolanda because nothing would bring Selena back to him.
After Selena's death, time seemed to stand still but Mateo was proof that it didn't. At 10 months old, he was a ball of fire, getting into anything and everything. Not quite walking yet but that didn't stop him from crawling as fast as he could to try and keep up with his older cousins.
   Chris flipped through one of his mother's many photo albums while Mateo cruised along the couch. His mom had documented everything meticulously, dedicating a whole page to his and Selena's baby shower a year ago. They had been so happy, so excited for the future. How had it all gone so wrong? Chris was snapped out of his thoughts when Mateo tried to pull the book out of his hands.
"You want to see what I'm looking at, don't you buddy?" Mateo giggled at him as Chris placed him on his lap. Chris pointed out various family members before Mateo pointed at a picture of Selena. The photo had been taken after her last concert, she had been exhausted but it was hard to tell from her bright smile.
"That's your mama, she loves you so much even though she's not here anymore." Mateo babbled back at him as he continued. "You remind me of her so much, you may be my twin but you've got her smile and her personality," he laughs. "You're gonna give me gray hairs just trying to keep up with you." Chris tried to flip the page but Mateo pointed at the picture again and smiled before saying his first word, "Mama."

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I hope you've enjoyed reading this chapter, I know it was dark and somewhat depressing but I promise that next chapter will be more lighthearted and you'll get to meet grown up Mateo. Mateo will become the main POV after the next chapter. Thank you for reading, let me know what you think :)