The Perfect Storm [Park Jimin FF]

Part III

The painting of Jimin took three days to finish, with all the details and the background and now it hangs in my room and I can look at it when I'm lying in bed. Which is exactly what I'm doing now. A few days has passed since the day I started painting him and I've been twisting my brain about exactly what happened. The feelings I experienced can best be described as the start of a crush, but is that really what it is? Or did the atmosphere just trigger some reactions that I normally wouldn't have? But now that I think about it, my heart has fluttered a few times lately because of Jimin, so it wasn't just yesterday. It has just never been as intense as it was while I painted him, but it was kind of intense what happened too. We've never kissed that way before, that I know for sure. I've never actually kissed him and been that emotionally affected by it. I'm pretty sure it was different for him too and that he was affected as well. But what exactly does this mean? Am I falling in love with Jimin? And if so, am I gonna be in love with two people at the same time? Is Jimin falling in love with me? And if so, what about his feelings for Areum? All these questions gives me a headache and I decide that I can't do much about it right now. I'll just have to see what it's like with Jimin in the days to come and where this is gonna take me.

The following week I don't get much time with Jimin. We're both focused on our papers and for some reason he hasn't come over. Is he avoiding me? I fear that he is, and because of that, I haven't dared going to his apartment either. But this distance from him is making me very uneasy. Though it has also convinced me that what I feel for him has exceeded friendship and become something more. The pain I feel from separation is not something you would feel from missing someone who's only a friend. I've experienced it a million times with Taehyung, so I know for sure. Speaking of Taehyung, he hasn't occupied my thoughts much this past week. It has been mainly Jimin and I haven't seen Taehyung either. And the longing hasn't been anything like it usually is. Am I finally starting to let go? Or is it just a temporary thing? Am I temporarily blinded by Jimin, only to lose interest and return to loving Taehyung? I'm so confused. I need to see Jimin.

I don't text Jimin to say I'm coming over, because I'm afraid he'll tell me to stay away. If he really has been avoiding me, then he probably doesn't want to see me. But I can't stand this anymore. I need to see him and figure out what is happening to me, to us. So, with firm determination I go to his apartment, but as soon as I'm standing in front of his door, I hesitate. Did I do something stupid? Should I not have come? Will me coming here make him mad? I'm about to retreat, but then shakes all these negative thoughts out of my head and press the code to his door. It's probably best to let myself in, since he then can't act like he isn't home. I step inside and close the door behind me. There's dead silent in the apartment and I wonder if he might not be home. It's late afternoon so I thought he would be home to get some dinner. But he could have decided to eat outside. I hesitate once again, when I suddenly hear noise coming from his bedroom. I take my shoes off and step further inside. Jimin appears in the door to his bedroom and when he spots me, he stops dead in his tracks. I can't get myself to look at his face so instead I look at his body. He's wearing sweatpants, a tank top and an oversized unzipped zip up that has slipped off on one side, exposing his shoulder. I've seen him in similar clothes many times before, but for the first time I find him very attractive and sexy in it. I must have fallen badly. But just then I notice he's holding something in his right hand and it takes a while before I realise what it is. A bra. My eyes widen and I finally look up to meet his eyes. I point at the bra in his hand and he looks down on it as well. He bites his lip and apparently doesn't want to meet my eye.

"Is there something I should know?" I ask and I'm surprised by how cold I sound. Is jealousy sticking its ugly head forward? Jimin doesn't answer, which only makes bad worse. Did he seriously have a girl over? Is she still here!? I step forward and push my way past him. I look around his bedroom, and to my relief there's no one in here. Then who does the bra belong to? I turn around to look at Jimin again and I can't read the expression on his face.