Sometimes, i wonder how fast I've been running, covered few decades, maybe, maybe not. Fast track, I've been counting stars lately, a different personality, a new perspective, no more judgemental, lonely whispers, a gunner for now..
Illusions are lucid realities for my status presently, sitting lately on my couch losing my mind, pure joy, solace, yearning subconscious, nope!
I mean I'm humane like you but not in actions, definitely not my reality. Oh! Was this meant to be my final letter to you? I guess not, judge my wits i suppose.
It all starts but a story, more like a reality played in fiction.What happens then when the one who wipes away your tears is the one making you cry? Don't go down there lad, I'm not a preacher, just awaken your mind.
Like we have a constellation of stars, we also have a pattern of rhythm. Humour, sarcasm, metaphor likewise others.
We are aligned by these patterns that form our mannerisms, characteristics and personalities.
You judge that maniac, the weirdo, the tempered, you're not any better, we're all maniacs in the making.. scoff.
That's my introduction i guess, hope it's nothing short of pessimism.HEARTFELT
Ever been in love? Well not since i found any sort of sense in it, better reasoning for all six senses, all i feel around now are just shadows, share my plight, i was the happy lad off about 5ft tall, my name? I'm Jay by the way, i should've figured that out by now hopefully, or maybe my name is a separate personality from my reality. Scoff....
Where were my manners by the way, almost same cause as fate or an alignment of my infinite self and ridicule. Maybe i sound so much like a little less confusionist, see I'm just a sad lad who's not afraid to die most importantly, I've gotten away from myself, I'm in my imaginary Elysian, all things being perfect. At the time i woke up, my world was gone,i had been through a devastating fate, my love was an illusion. Her name is Freya, fair complexion, competitive, pretty much a love wreck, flair, proud, always with the "i don't care" attitude, she had the looks of my flowered subconsciousness, that distinct smile and character flaw.
Unfortunately my bane kept on calling for a lover, yes! She was my bane. For the first time in my sober reality i felt love, really! I guess i was her personal teddy, when she was ready she'd play with me, when she felt sad she'd toss me aside finding solace in her pride, she was pitiful, loveable, but unloved by her character, twas her flaw, as much as i always try to forget, my past takes up the services of opening up a previous devastating chapter of my life.
I've always wondered why love movies in their ranks always end up a mess or a tragedy like my life.. I've been watching those life changing scenes for a while now, yunno it's been quite the touch i needed. The likes of:
*ME BEFORE YOU*PASSENGERS
*THE FAULT IN OUR STARS
*FIVE FEETS APART
*EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
*AFTER
*THE SUN IS ALSO A STAR
YOU ARE READING
JUST FOR A WHILE!!
Fanfictionthe moment you chase perfection only to catch shadows and realise empty mansions