Being an actress, living my life for myself for the first time in the last ten years without wanting to care about anything in the world has its own ups and downs.
I was already 31 when I auditioned for the first time to play side roles in movies and TV series. The first few auditions still make me cringe even after 10 years of being in this profession. People say we would be able to laugh on our past mistakes someday but I don't think I would ever be able to laugh remembering such moments.
It was really trying, rather a very difficult task, for me to finally convince my parents that I was leaving my high paying job of six years to finally plunge into something that I was passionate about. They thought I was out of my mind obviously. They even told me I was going crazy because I was never in a stable relationship or had a child to be responsible for. Indeed, that must be the most reasonable reason most parents have when their children go astray as an adult or face middle life crisis.
But I thought that I have lived enough of their lives and if I want to waste away my remaining life doing what I want, it's going to be my choice. Regrets or no regrets, I made up my mind to finally go for what I dreamt of.
No, I never thought of becoming a TV personality or a movie star when I was a kid. I wasn't planning on becoming anyone. I was rather dreaming in my day dreams taking each day as it was. I still do that a lot.
Well, I wanted to say more but what's the point. I am past being cynical of myself or anyone and anything about my past.
No, I didn't fight with my parents or anything but I know they are a bit uncomfortable when they get asked why I am into this profession when I am 'old'. Let it be.
I just wanted to be someone who's living different lives onscreen playing all kinds of adult personalities. I don't think I would get insanely famous or downright going to be a pauper who got rejected of roles.
Because one thing I was sure about myself: I am good at what I do. That is, getting what I want.
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