The Fault In Our Stars

Chapter Two

Breaking the news to my father and my little brother was probably worse than when I first heard it. My little brother - Brice - crumbled into a little ball and started to sob and I just stood there like a moron, just staring at him. I had no clue what to do. I ended up biting my lip, walking up to my room and then flopping down onto my bed. 

Was I going to die? 

I'm sure this is one of the first questions that pops up into a person's mind when they find out that they have cancer. Funnily enough, this question or what the answer could be does not scare me. If I'm going to die, so be it. Everybody dies at some point or another, if mine just so happens to come before everyone else’s then i'm just going to have to live with it. There is no other choice is there?

That does not mean i'm not going to fight for my life, i'm just not going to fight my death. 

I logged onto twitter and noticed a bunch of tweets coming in from various fans. I had around 400,000 followers just because I was one of Niall's best friends whom he tweeted frequently. I had sent out a tweet before going into hospital saying 'going to find out my test results, ahh D:' and a lot of the fans had replied asking what the results were. I don't think i'm ready to tell them, or Niall just yet. I'd rather he found out in person, so instead I just tweeted a simple message.

@AliceOC: It's official, I hate hospitals. 

I rolled over onto my stomach and then logged onto facebook. I scrolled down my news feed and looked at every single person I knew getting on with their life. None of them had cancer cells in their bodies multiplying by the hour, none of them had to start chemo next week and none of the-

There really is no point in wallowing in my misery, what is it going to do but make me unhappier? That’s when my phone began to ring. I picked it up and Niall's voice sounded down the receiver.

"I have a surprise for you!" he sung 

I laughed "Oh really, what is it?" 

"Brace yourself" 

"Ok, I've braced myself" 

"I'm coming home next week!" 

"I know" Oh my god he was so pathetic but so adorable at the same time. 

"Wait" his enthusiasm died down "How?"

"Your mum told my mum" 

"Oh my god I told her not to tell you" he groaned "i think she hates me"

"She has good reason to" I teased

"Shut up you idiot! I miss you" 

That’s when I felt my chest tighten and a lump arise in my throat. Tears filled my eyes and I wanted to say 'i miss you too' back but I just couldn't bring myself to say anything. I don't know why that simple sentence made me so upset but how the hell would I be able to tell him that I had cancer? I remember in year five when I broke my arm because we were arm-wrestling and he cried for three days straight. I can't imagine him when I tell him that I have bloody cancer. 

"Alice?" 

"Y-Yes" I finally pushed myself to speak

"Are you" he paused "Ok" 

"No" i squeaked and then shut the phone down.