Forbidden

1

Hello again. Long time no see. 

Please note a general trigger warning of mature themes including but not limited to: sex, drugs, alcohol, cursing, talk of miscarriage, abuse, domestic violence, injury. While I try to include everything as sensitively as I can, I am aware that these themes might not be for everyone. Please proceed with what you are comfortable with. 

Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoy this story as much as I do. While I do include those trigger warnings, I happen to love the overall plot. It's very 1D focused, which also include Liam. Writing about him is not meant to be offensive or insensitive. I started writing this in 2020 and want to complete it in honor of one of my favorite bands and happy places. 

Enjoy. x

...

Harry Styles

"Fuck, baby," my fiancée, Victoria, says as I pull out of her.

Somehow she managed to orgasm even though my erection barely lasted. I wasn't hard to begin with when her hands started traveling down my body and her lips attached to mine. I simply wasn't in the mood for sex. I haven't been in a while it seems like. It's turned into this mindless activity for me that I almost feel obligated to do. 

I quickly peel the condom off of my already soft length, huffing from disappointment that I didn't even cum. Not that I was in the mood for anything sexual today but I was at least hoping to get something out of the sex. Recently my hand has been my main source of getting off but even then it's stodgy.

"Are you coming back to bed?" Victoria asks as I dispose of the condom in a small trash can nearby.

I look over at where she seductively lays on our bed. Her big eyes bore into mine, her hair messily hanging in her face. I can tell by her expression she's still turned on but I can't continue, honestly. I don't have it in me to pretend to be sexually interested in her today. Plus I think I might just be permanently soft at this point.

"I think I'm actually going to run out to the store," I tell her, causing her to pout. "I think we need some more dried fruit - the apricots you like. Holland and Barrel is closed tomorrow so I'll need to go today."

Victoria sighs, clearly disappointed by my lack of attention right now but I can't find it in me to care. I don't consider myself to be an awful person but I need a break. I need space away from Victoria 

"Okay, baby. You'll be back soon?" she asks.

I nod and force a smile on my face.

"Yes, love," I say. Then I quickly get dressed and say goodbye to Victoria before leaving our house. 

I feel relieved once I'm in my car. I didn't necessarily need to leave literally right after we had sex but my mind felt so clouded. I knew my mood would have rubbed off on Victoria in the wrong way and I didn't want to hurt her. I already feel shitty enough for my lack of interest in her. I don't need to be bluntly rude either. 

Victoria and I met a little more than a year ago at some fashion show in Milan. Ironically enough, she was introduced to me by one of my ex-girlfriends. I thought she was decently pretty and we wound up fucking in the bathroom the night we met. I wasn't expecting to keep in contact with her, and quite frankly I'm not even sure how she got my phone number because I don't recall ever giving it to her. Nevertheless, she was relentless in contacting me and somehow a relationship came out of it.