Hold you tight | BTS . PJM

Chapter 4- Tears

"Dad, what's wrong with mummy?" Ryu asked in a low tone as I dried his hair with the towel.

"She must have hit her head somewhere so maybe her memory might be a bit hazy" I replied.

"But we buried mummy. Her grave is still there....unless that's someone else we buried" Ryu's eyes grew large in panic.

"Shhh...calm down Ryu lets's not rush to assumptions yet. Maybe it is a miracle" my head was running with so many questions that I couldn't think properly.

"Or maybe she fell from heaven?" Ryu suggested another reason. And that could be the case as well. But that didn't matter at the moment. Grabbing Ryu's head between my hands I locked his eyes on me.

"Look son, all it matters now that she is here. We need to keep this a secret from everyone and mummy as well okay? Until we find the answers or else they might take mummy away and if mummy knows she was.."

Dead. Why was it hard to say. Maybe because she is right here

"She won't stay okay?" Ryu shook his head

"No I don't want that" his eyes started to water.

"Okay you have to promise daddy okay?" hugged him rubbing his back. Ryu nodded his head lifting his pinky.

"I promise"

"Good now let's help mummy get her memory back okay? It might be tough but I know we are the strong boys like mummy always wanted" I smiled ruffling his hair as we got up.

I shouldn't assume she was Y/N. She was dead. Her name set on stone yet...Am I getting another chance? Has my wish come true? Or is this someone who has amnesia who looks like her? I really want it to be her.. please let it be her and this wasn't a mistake or is this a really good yet bad dream still?

We crept silently into the room that I never thought I would open again. She stirred in her sleep as the floor creaked with our soft footsteps. Y/N was a light sleeper another thing she had in common with her but my other conscience still needs to adjust. Ryu gently held onto her hands and her eyes fluttered open at the sudden contact.

"Jimin?" she sat up and looked down at her hand then to Ryu. I held my breath as I stood in the corner to see if she can recognise him. Ryu smiled and cupped her hand to his chest and slowly her eyes started to glisten.

"Mummy you have to remember me okay?" Ryu wiped her tears as his voice slowly started to crack. But being the big boy he is he held it in.

"I will help you. I'm Ryu and I am 8 years old. I'm your son and Jimin is my papa and your husband" Y/N gasp covering her mouth with more tears.

"Ryu" she said softly and Ryu nodded his head and hugged her tightly.

"Yes mummy that's my name"

Y/N frowned at her own child before pushing him away soon realising it pained the boy more by her sudden action.

"I...I'm sorry" she stuttered and stood up wobbling a bit then ran past him.
I was about to run after her but I glued to the same spot looking worriedly at Ryu whose back was facing me. He was gazing at the window.

"Go, mummy needs you" he said not looking away. I approached him and see him rubbing the tears away trying to hide them and then he looked at me smiling.

"I'm going to try harder dad. Mum just needs time so don't worry about me. I'm going to bed first" he grinned and stood up smiling at me despite the tears wouldn't stop building around the corner of his eyes.

"Come here Ryu" and I gave him a big hug. And quick peck on his head before running after her.

She didn't run far. She stood in the middle of the grass field looking at her surroundings. I approached her from behind cautiously observing her.

"Ryu Ryu Ryu" she chanted over and over again and sighed in frustration hitting her head.

"Why can't I-" I held her wrist stopping her from hurting herself any further.

"Jimin?" she looked at me studying my face then tears flowed out again. I don't remember her being this weak or fragile before. And God does it hurt so much to see her like this.

"It's okay we will help you get better"I cooed to her as I held her in my arms and stroking her head to calm her down.

Y/N shook her head distancing herself breaking our contact. "I don't know who I am" she hugged herself.

"You're Y/N"

"No I'm- I.." she sealed her lips. Another confused look on her face.

"Does this place bring any memory?"

She looked around her surrounding. "No but...that bridge. I was lost but somehow my body led me there" she spoke slowly.

Of course the bridge it made sense

"This must be a sign you're Y/N. That bridge...that bridge it's where...hah..it was where I first asked you out" I said smiling reminiscing the past. 

"Then how come I don't remember my own child?" she cried and I just wanted to grab her again and make those tears disappear.

Why can't she just be happy to see us

"He was young then you only raised him for four years maybe you can only remember things from the very past. Back when that bridge was our little hideout when we were kids. Don't worry it takes time to recover" I spoke softly and she nodded her head looking down.

"Look Ryu and myself, we are going to help you okay? But you need to help yourself as well we're a team" I grabbed her shoulder firmly squeezing them with assurance.

Y/N closed her eyes and nodded with a small smile. "Okay thank you...Jimin" she said softly and stood close to me.

I wrapped my arms slowly around her gently and cautiously and she leaned her body against mine. It was like a lock and key she fitted so perfectly in my arms. There was a familiarity holding her. Yes, she is Y/N. She came back. This simple touch confirmed it all. God returned her to us but it doesn't matter if her memories are not. We will paint her blank canvas.