Emma Grasping The Reins

Part 14: A Fly on the Wall

The rest of the month passed by with little to no excitement. I chose to remain aloof for the most part shutting myself up in my room, reading, thinking and listening to music. I avoided Val as much as possible. I felt too guilty to act like everything was okay, and too cowardly to tell her the reasons why. In fact, I avoided pretty much everyone. Everyone except for Emma that is, because I just couldn't bear to be away from her.

I became a frequent visitor at Emma's house, something that gave me more joy than I can say. Taking care of Tommy and preparing him for the world seemed to give her a renewed sense of purpose and resolve. Often times I would find Tommy sitting beside Emma while she read to him. Like the proverbial fly on the wall, I frequently sat off to the side reading my own novel in silence, all too happy to remain mute. Just being there in the same room as Emma was enough for me. The sweetness of her voice echoing in the background was the only peace I really knew.

Still there were days when Emma would grow bitter or gloomy, but most of the time she remained cheerful and in good spirits. Staying true to her word, one day she returned to have another chat with my mother. I sensed she was quickly working her way into my mother's heart as well. The favor in which my mother began to speak of Emma worried me that she was growing fonder of her than I.

Jonathan too learned to appreciate Emma more and more. After all she was Lydia's best friend and her knowledge and advice came to be viewed more like wisdom, thereby exalting her in his eyes. It seemed to amuse Emma how sought out her opinion had become, and most days she was all too happy to provide it.

Although Jonathan managed to gain Lydia's favor, she remained coquettish and uncommitted keeping her affections perennially dancing on a string. She found great amusement watching her admirers chasing after it while continually keeping it just out of their reach. Perhaps most amusing of all was how this only seemed to increase their determination and resolve. Jonathan had gone half mad over her charms, and trying to deter him now seemed more hopeless than ever.

 After a month had come and gone, Lydia as promised released Val from her servitude. Though she made no secret about her disappointment in losing such a convenience. One that she had so happily grown accustomed to. And although this should have come as a welcome relief for me, it felt more like an impossible burden instead.

The day of reckoning had finally come, and not surprisingly I deeply regretted not coming clean before instead of having relied on lies and avoidance. Now there was nothing left to do but tell Val the truth with some glimmer of hope that she might actually be willing to forgive me.

When the dreaded day finally came, the sun was shining brightly in the sky, yet I felt nothing short of gloomy. I made my way to school pondering the weight of my words and actions. When I arrived, Lydia met me in the hallway sporting a big grin on her face. She slipped a folded note into my coat pocket. "For when you get home" she told me. Then she scurried off, disappearing into a crowd of students. Despite the nagging temptation to immediately tear it open and read it, I decided it best to wait until I got home.

I went straight to my English class which not surprisingly passed by slowly and ever so drearily. I spent the majority of my time shooting furtive glances in Val's direction while periodically checking the clock as the hands gradually inched their way forward.

After class I caught up with Val amongst the throngs of students in the hallway. "Hey Nathen" she said clutching her large stack of books. She appeared to be in good spirits, which all things considered I took as a welcome relief. After all I was the reluctant bearer of bad news. Bad news that was long overdue and sure to be unwelcome.

"You have finally completed your restitution" I said walking along-side her.

"I know! Thank God! Hey, why don't you come over to my place so we can officially celebrate. We can finally discuss those books I asked you to read."