"chuuya."

xxiv.

dear chuuya,

when my mother told me to promise her something, i said “yes“ so quickly. i guess it was because of that naïve notion you have when you think that, when you do anything and everything to safe the ones you love, when you share your blinding light with your dearest so their own fire won't die down, please don't die down, that it could preserve their life for a little while longer.

so i said “yes.“

“promise me, y/n,“ she started and coughed into the crook of her elbow before turning to me again.

“promise me that, even if you're scared that it's not the right thing, even if you're scared that it'll cause problems... promise me you'll tell him. you'll tell him, and you'll say it loud.“

“mom,“ i whispered, wiping a tear from my face. “of course i promise.“

i surrendered to my love for you back then, i surrendered completely.

i just hoped, in that moment, that i wouldn't regret placing my heart into your palms before you knew it.