Someday

Chapter 3

Monsoon

I am completely shocked. Orange? Paanong Orange? I don't fucking understand what is happening. Na-estatwa ako sa kinatatayuan habang nakatitig sa akin ng malalim si Ygo. Para bang isang malaking palaisipan ang mga nangyayari. Kahit ako, hindi rin makapaniwala. I tried to divert my thinking into what's real. What could be the meaning behind this?

"May alam ka ba tungkol dito?" ha? Tangina kahit ako nga wala nakong alam sa mga ginagawa namin.

"Malamang wala. Kahit ako nagulat rin. Akala ko kaya n'ya sinasabi yung Orange ay dahil sa mga panaginip nya. We both know she doesn't make sense most of the time." I took the chair beside him. For the first time in years, her condition shifts to orange. Hindi ko alam kung matutuwa ba ako o matatakot. Her results are stagnant ever since, and to appear orange is an unbelievable color. Kasi bakit ngayon? Anong nangyari? Does that mean she will get better? Will this be better? Fuck, I need to get focus.

"Red, I need you to hold her for the meantime. I might be leaving next week or sooner. I have to find a new laboratory for relocation. This is getting serious. We have to start the process now before everything is used against us." Aniya.

"Teka lang, hindi ba masyadong maaga? She might react differently if we shocked her. This is a progress Ygo, hindi ito result. Kung maari lang, let her cope first. At laboratory? We don't have funds for that. Everybody knows we quit and you, being in a rush, will get things overboard."

Ayaw ko nang pahirapan si Elle. Inaatake ako ng konsensya tuwing sumisigaw sya sa sakit. Nawawala ako sa focus, sa kung ano bang layunin namin, kaya namin ito ginagawa. Kung maari lang, itatakas ko nalang sya dito tapos bibigyan ng normal na buhay. Pero hindi iyon makatotohanan, lahat kami dito naiipit sa bigat ng responsibilidad.

"What do you suggest, Red? Its been years and I want to go home. I want to finish this. I can't keep waiting every damn day for her to recover. We both know it shouldn't be our responsibility to continue this, but you still insist to take!"

I lowered my head, he is in front me, restless. Tama sya masyado nang mahaba ang paghihintay namin. Pero.... paano si Elle?

"Ygo, as your brother I am saying, this is not the right time yet. What if she reacts differently? Like what happened two years ago? I just want us to be cautious of our actions. Please let her get her energy back."  I don't want to start a fight. I don't want him mad. I am trying my best not to anger him because this wouldn't be possible if he didn't support me. He is the brain of this plan. Our plan.

Yndigo is calm, most of the time. He is more capable of deciding than me, which is why I don't want to reach the point where he will explode. I still remember how he tried to buried everything so that we can get out of this. Alive.

He finished his drink and sat on the one-seated chair in front of me. Even though he looks calm and composed all the time, he can be also stubborn. His beard is reaching his upper face and there are scattered puzzle pieces on the floor. Ganito s'ya pag hindi n'ya control ang nangyayari at 'pag hindi s'ya mapakali, ginagawa n'yang therapy ang alak.

"Red, I trust you with everything. Alam mo yon hindi ba? Kasama kita sa lahat ng nangyari. You know everything about me."  Aniya.

"Namamaalam ka ba? Mas mahal ang kabaong kesa sa alak. Sabihin mo lang kung anong alak ang makakapagpatulog sayo at bibilhan kita ng dalawampung case."  I said, trying to lighten up the situation.

"Tsk. Seryoso ako dito. Umayos ka nga."

"Magkasama tayo sa lahat. Kung ano man mangayari, kung saanman tayo dahil ng plano nandito ako sa likod mo para umalalay. Kung nangangamba ka na na mabibigo tayo sa mga pinaghirapan natin, ibig sabihin lang noon malapit na tayo sa dulo. Pag patapos na, mas lalong mabigat ang pagsubok."  I smile. He needs encouragement and he needs it from me.

"Hermanos." Siya.

"Hermanos." Lumapit ako sa kanya at hinawakan s'ya sa balikat. Matatapos rin 'to. Makakabangon din kami.

Sunset. I stared at the setting sun. What an ironic view. Sunset huh? I guess this is not my last sunset today. I caress my jaw and instantly groan in pain. Masakit ang pagkakahawak ni Jared sa panga ko. To my surprise, he is harsher than his brother. Alipin ng emosyon. I always thought that Yndigo is more vulnerable in his emotions. Well, this day is full of surprises. Malalaman ko rin kung sino ang mas mahina.

"Fuck, ang sakit talaga. Sana sa kama n'ya na lang ako sinakal." I muttered

"What do you mean?"  Muntik na'ko mapatayo sa gulat. Lumingon ako at napansin ang paglapit ni Yndigo sa gilid ko. Isa lang ang upuan sa veranda, at gamit ko na iyon. Kaya nagtataka ako sa paglapit n'ya. Sana pala si Jared nalang ang pumunta rito para naman magantihan ko s'ya sa pagkakasakal n'ya sa'kin.

"Isa lang ang upuan dito, Yndigo." Tumingala ako sa kanya pero nabawi rin 'yon ng umupo s'ya sa sahig. Indian sit. Weird.

"Aalis nalang ako. Dito kana maupo." Tatayo na sana ako pero pinigilan n'ya ko ng magsalita s'ya.

"Maninigarilyo lang naman ako rito Sunny. Hindi mo kailangang umalis."  Naglabas s'ya ng dalawang stick at inabot sa'kin ang isa. Humindi ako dahil hindi pa ko kumakain. Sinindihan n'ya na lang ang isa at bumuga ng malalim.

"Bakit ka naninigarilyo, Yndigo?"

"Kailangan ba may dahilan 'pag naninigarilyo?" Sabat n'ya.

"Kung ikaw ang gagawa, syempre oo." Kasi palaging siyang seryoso at miminsan lamang s'ya naninigarilyo na may kasama. At bakit ba nag-aasume ako?

"Mali ata ang tanong mo, Sunny." Tsk. Matalino talaga tong hayop na to.

"Bakit ka naninigarilyo habang nandito ako? I anticipated. Pwede rin naman tong si Yndigo. Medyo mabango s'ya today.

Ah 'yan ba tanong mo? Wala lang. Tinatamad ako maglinis nang upos. Kaya ikaw maglilinis 'pag natapos ko 'tong dalawang stick." Punyeta. Binabawi ko na, amoy-usok s'ya today. Makaalis na nga baka balak n'ya pang manigarilyo nang isang kaha.

Tumayo nalang ako at hindi na s'ya sinagot pa. Bahala s'ya dyan. Nagugutom nako, parang masarap titigan si Red ngayon.

"Kung anuman ang deal nyo ni Red, leave Elle out of it. Okay lang na mamatay ka o ako. Hwag lang silang dalawa. Set aside your personal feelings, Sunny." Napatigil ako. Sinasabi ko na nga ba, may dahilan ang pagpunta n'ya. I just chuckle humorlessly and answered him.

"I don't like Red. I want him. Even if he doesn't like me, he can't get me out of this. You can't stop me from wanting him."  Try all you want, at the end of the day. You both still need me.

"I do not worry for my brother. He can deal with you. Point is, you are insinuating something on Elle. Your personal feelings will ruin your escape Sunny."  I ignored it. Not today. The sunset still sets. Lumakad na'ko papalayo kahit na may sinabi pa s'ya bago ako makaalis nang tuluyan sa veranda.

"Be careful Sunny, the Sun can die too."

I know Ygo, you will be the first one to know it.