My friends didn't come to see me today. Without their loud banter my day was filled with games played against myself and watching the day go by slowly. So painfully slow. My mind is a lonely place to be. I dont get out much. The landlady is really nice to me. She listens to me when nobody else does. My friends don't like to listen to me. They usually blur into a segway and soon Im stuck in my own mind. They do that to me.
I spend a lot of time staring out my window, watching the world pass me by. Watching people go about their day. Dogs bark. Birds chirp.
Birds.
I hate birds. The annoying call of the birds invades my mind and disrupts my quiet. I really enjoy the quiet. When it gets too loud I lose my focus. Shouting bounces off the walls and the accustics of my house endlessly crescendo the noise until I can't even hear what's right over what's wrong and the world is spiraling and spiraling and spiraling spiraling spiraling down.
And then it's quiet.
And when it's quiet everything crashes. Much like coming down from a high I fall fall fall. It seems as if I'm continuing to plunge into an everlasting abyss of darkness. But I always seem to wake up. Wake up staring at the same glowing chandelier on the same lumpy matress in the same concrete house.
I want my pillow back.
