Ring

.01

It's been two years since I first started liking her. You would think after two years and there was no progression in this crush, I would've moved on but I didn't. I was still very much infatuated with her. In two years a lot of things changed for me and my group. Our popularity skyrocketed and we were now famous not just in Asia but all over the world. We've attended many overseas award shows and had several of our comebacks at said famous award shows.

To say that we were the biggest group in the world is not a stretch. That's exactly what it's like right now for us. Our Army grew so much as well. We were bigger than the big agencies back home. We broke so many barriers and achieved so many awards; records. We did a lot for our country and this rollercoaster of a career was not stopping anytime soon. I am very thankful and grateful for all of this. I never thought in a million years something like this will happen to me yet here I am constantly traveling, meeting big name celebrities, attending all these prestigious events. Life is truly a blessing but if there was one downfall about this life is not being able to spend it with someone you love.

I would love to share all the glory that I've been receiving with a significant other but I haven't met a person that I truly genuinely felt a connection with. Well that's a lie, there was one person that I felt this pull too. Whenever I was near her, I felt this automatic draw. A smile would always be on my face because of her. I knew she was always near because I would hear a ringing sound. I thought she felt the same way but sadly, she didn't. After years of crushing on her, I finally built the confidence to ask her out which I did but she turned me down.

It's been months since she turned me down yet she constantly stays on my mind. Since the rejection, I have fully dedicated all my time that was not spent with the boys to making videos, working on my mixtape and anything that involves keeping my mind busy so I don't have to think about her. There were moments that I succeeded but there were also moments when the loneliness seeps in and I can't help but wonder. Wonder how she is doing. What is she doing? Wonder why she rejected me? Wonder if I'll ever move on. Those thoughts plagued my mind for months.

There was a moment when those thoughts became too much. I was with all my hyungs and we were having a bonding moment. We were reflecting back on everything that was going on in our careers. We talked about the moment we thought about disbanding and how thankful that we all agreed that we were in this together til the very end. It was an emotional night and I broke down that moment. I remember it so clearly, my hyungs were all surprised to see me in that state. I cried and poured my heart out at how lonely this life is. How much I wanted to have someone to share this all with.

It was the first time I ever showed a different side to my hyungs. This vulnerability was new to me and them. After I spoke my truth, Jimin hyung poured his heart out at how much he misses Mina and how he can't get over the betrayal she caused him. After we both poured our hearts out, Yoongi hyung advised us all to stay away from TWICE. It was a weird night but a much needed night as I needed the comfort from my hyungs.

After that night, it became a little easier to deal with my feelings towards her. I even tried to move on. I started talking to Rose for a while but that didn't go anywhere. I even thought maybe it was time I actually pursue something with Yeri since we've always had a no strings attached friendship but I found out she actually had a boyfriend. After my poor attempts of trying to move on didn't work out, I realized it was better to just wait to see what happens. The sound of the ringing bell started to fade as well.

That all changed though the moment I walked backstage, we were currently at the venue for Melon Genie Awards and we just finished our rehearsal. As we made our way back to our dressing room, I just noticed that our dressing room was right next to TWICE's. I must've not noticed it the first time and that was when I was hit with the loudest ringing sound I have ever heard. She's here, I thought. I couldn't help but look towards their dressing room door. She is right behind that door.