Belphegor x Reader: Reconciled

Chapter Three

The Human

The attic, had it not been the location of some appalling circumstances would have been much more pleasant. The air was cool, but not cold. The light dim and filtered through a single high-up window in the point of the steeple. Belphegor's makeshift canopy bed was cozy, and the sun and moon, made from discarded treasures, added a look of child-like innocence. Ideal for a nap filled with sugar-sweet dreams. I dropped my hand from Belphegor's grip, resting it firmly on my hip.

"Climb in, Belphie." I said, trying to sound firm. "Once you're settled I'm going to try and make it to class." I urged him to climb into the bed. I was irritated. Irritated that I reacted so poorly to the stairs, irritated that I was in the attic, irritated at myself for getting involved. Irritated because I felt this little, nagging, itch in my chest at the idea of leaving the Avatar of Sloth on his own.

"You're... not going to stay?" Belphie asked, something flickered in his violet eyes. No, it is just the hazy light. "What about your promise to Beel?" He said, tossing his cow-patterned pillow towards me. He began unfastening the buttons on his RAD jacket.

I caught the pillow, and tucked it under my arm. "I kept it! Look, I've seen you all the way to bed." I threw my pillow-free my arm in front of me, indicating the attic and the bed.

"I guess there must be someone else you can choose..." The demon said, his voice trailing off so quietly I missed the last part of what he had whispered. I didn't bite. He wanted me to engage, and I wouldn't do it. He dropped the coat onto the foot of the bed, and kicked off his shoes. He held his arms up. "Toss me my pillow. Then go, I guess. Since you don't want to stay with me."

I ground my teeth. He was doing that thing. That aggressive-because-I'm-not-getting-my-way thing. I threw the pillow at him, forcefully. It struck him in the face, the tassel on the corner making a satisfying flawk noise against his head. He gathered the pillow against his chest and shot a look at me filled with venom. "You stupid human. I know you hate me, but you don't have to throw things at me."

"I don't hate you!" I said, my hands shooting to the sides of my head, burring themselves in my hair. "And you threw your pillow at me first."

"Then why won't you spend any time with me?" the demon shouted, his voice was strained again. There was something more than anger in there.

"I don't trust you, Belphiegor!" I shouted back. "Not completely."

The Avatar of Sloth's eyes went wide, violet and stormy purple. His cheeks turned pale, then flushed bright red. He puffed up his chest, his shoulders went back. He was so often curled up and sleeping, it was easy to forget how much larger than me he was. How demonic he could look when his face became shadowy with anger. I took a step backwards, ready to bolt down the stairs. Beel's still here. Maybe I can make it to him if...

"I know." Said Belphegor. He was whispering again, quieter than a breeze. The voice of a mouse, not a powerful demon. I started, shivers running over my skin. "I know I made a mistake. I'm sorry. I just... I just don't know what else to do..." Belphegor said. His voice fell even lower. He clutched his pillow tightly to his chest, flattening it with the force of his arms. His cheeks were flushed pink, and growing steadily darker. From anger or embarrassment or a mix of both, I wasn't really sure. "...I want to be together a little longer."

"Excuse me?"

"Never mind." He said, his head dipped lower. "I'm used to being alone."

"Are you... are you trying to guilt me into staying?" I said. My voice was tight. Fury was building in my limbs, locking my jaw. "Seriously?"

"No!" The Avatar of Sloth said, loudly, defensively. "I... I don't know what to say to you. I want you around me. Like when you would talk to me through the door when I was trapped in here. I just don't know how to make it happen!" His chest was heaving, his weight shifting from foot to foot. An anxious, frightened energy was filling the attic. I stepped back, positioning myself to bolt down the spiraling staircase.

I thought back to the night that Belphegor had struck me, and my stomach dropped. A rock sinking into a deep well. Where was the bottom? I looked at the demon, searched his face for malice. But I couldn't find it. This was all very familiar, similar to that awful night, but very different too. Reversed. I was the one filled with anger. And the demon? He was the one that was scared.

I exhaled through my nose, counting my breath out. I'm never going to be calm again. I rested my hand on my stomach. One, two, three, four and five... "Sit down, Belphie," I said, speaking through the tremor in my voice. "You look like you're going to pass out." I motioned to the makeshift bed in the corner of the room, tucked under the peaked roof. I led the way, leaning back against the headboard, one leg tucked under me, the other hanging with a toe grazing the ground. I watched the demon stride across the room, and sink into the mattress. He drew one knee up to his chest and rested his chin against it. He hadn't taken his eyes off of me.

"I... I don't hate you, Belphie, really. I thought I would, I thought I did, but I don't." I said. He opened his mouth to speak, maybe to justify what had happened between us. His reasons, flawed as they were. I lifted my hand and silenced him, shaking my head. "I know you're doing your best to fix this space between us. To try and earn my trust again." He looked at me, his purple eyes were shadowed, his eyebrows drawn tightly together, wrinkling his forehead. The demon was waiting for me to make the next move, to push him deeper into the fog of his own fear. His loneliness. I sighed, and rolled my head back and forth on my neck. Easing the tension in my shoulders and spine.

"I'll stay, Belphie." I said.

His eyes went wide, and then, drooped back to his usual drowsy state. He drew his other knee up to his chest. "I'm sorry. You're not a stupid human." He said into his knees, his pillow absorbing his voice. He sounded very small to me. "I'm so sleepy... can I sleep on your shoulder?" He asked, hesitant, not sure if I would rebuke him or welcome him. I nodded to him, and patted my shoulder. He crawled over, the mattress dipping slightly under his hands and knees. The demon leaned his head against my shoulder, turned towards to me, with his pillow acting as a barrier between us.

"... I can hear your heart beating." Belphegor said softly, looking at me through the fringe of his dark lashes. "It's rushing."