𝒃𝒆𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒊 𝒎𝒆𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 - 𝘵𝘦𝘵𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘰 𝘬𝘶𝘳𝘰𝘰

6: the boy

Tetsurō went about the rest of the day with a skip in his step. He'd successfully executed his plan of getting Yamazaki to join him for a picnic, and she was finally seeming a little more receptive of his attention. Well, maybe receptive wasn't the best word...more like tolerating. Either way, he was overjoyed at having spent the entirety of lunch period with her.

After school, Tetsurō dragged Kenma along with him to the stationary store. Yamazaki had suggested he start a journal, so a journal he would start. First though, he'd need to buy a decent notebook.

"What in particular are you looking for?" Kenma asked as they found the store's selection of notebooks.

"I don't really know, something small enough to fit in my backpack I guess,"

"Here's one with a dog on it." Kenma said frankly as he showed his findings to Tetsurō. "You like dogs."

"I'm not seven."

Kenma raised his eyes to meet Tetsurō's. "Why should that make a difference?" He asked, deadpanned.

Tetsurō pointedly took the dog journal from Kenma and placed it back on the shelf. "Let's keep looking."

"This one has a dog and a cat." Kenma held up another one. "Doesn't Rini have a notebook with a cat on it?"

"Yeah," Tetsurō answered. "Wait, how would you know?"

"How would you?" Kenma said blankly.

"I'm sure this one will do." Tetsurō picked up an all-black journal without responding to Kenma's question. He walked to the front of the small shop and placed the journal on the checkout stand.

Kenma followed after him presently and added a pack of animal crossing stickers to the purchase without ceremony.

Tetsurō didn't question it, he simply paid for both items before he and Kenma left the store.

As they walked in the direction of Tetsurō's house, Kenma opened the pack of stickers and shoved the wrapping in his pocket. He took the journal from Tetsurō and started arranging the stickers on the cover of the notebook.

Tetsurō didn't say anything. Kenma had his thrills, and for whatever reason, stickers was one of them.

After several minutes focused on his little project, Kenma handed back the notebook. The sticker page, now completely empty, joined the cellophane wrapper in Kenma's pocket.

Tetsurō accepted the little re-decoration without protest.

The two arrived at Tetsurō's house, and since Kenma was fully immersed in his game by the time they were inside, Tetsurō decided to make his first journal entry.

Writing was a lot easier when he actually cared about what he was writing. After a good fifteen minutes of writing, he got out his laptop to edit his essay like Rini had suggested. It didn't take him long to have a full essay, and he was a lot happier with the end result then he had been with his first attempt. He looked forward to turning it in.

Tetsurō had never gotten particularly good grades when it came to literature. He was far more skilled in science and physics, but that seemed so boring. He enjoyed reading and writing a lot, when he actually made time to do it. That wasn't entirely his fault; he was busy thinking about exams, university, and of course, volleyball. But why should that prevent him?

No, if he thought about it enough, he knew that the reason he'd never endeavoured to write more was because he wasn't ready to explore himself that way. A piece of writing, even in it's most shallow form, tells a lot about it's author. Tetsurō thought about himself delicately. Words, while they were his tool, were also his enemy. They betrayed his innermost person, the person he tried to conceal. The childish, uncertain boy who had no idea what his place in the world was.

He wanted to be that boy. That boy collected magazine articles to cut into poems. That boy counted the cracks in the sidewalk because he thought they were beautiful. That boy had scrapped up knees and sun-burned cheeks but he was too busy indulging in his own imagination to care. That boy feared being forgotten.

Deep down, that's who he was. But at the same time, Tetsurō resented that boy. That was the boy of all his insecurities. It was the child he'd always been, and the picture of everything he kept hidden beneath his mask of self-assurance and arrogant independence.

Tetsurō opened his journal, feeling the need to record the mess of thoughts filling his mind. He had something to say, and even if nobody ever heard it, he was glad at having it said.

...The boy is me. When I look in the mirror, I see his face instead of mine. He lives somewhere in my mind, but he's always hiding from me. I told him to leave a long time ago but he never did. Why should he? He knows that he is me, and without him, I am nobody. Maybe it's a good thing that he's here; without him, would I even have any thoughts? Maybe he's the one writing this. It's hard to tell...

The words were crooked and the sentences didn't make sense. But Tetsurō kept writing. The more he wrote, the more he became convinced that it was really the boy holding the pen. Maybe it was finally time to face the boy for who he really was.

♥

"Hey Rini," her mother greeted her as she entered the kitchen.

"Hi mom." Rini placed her bento box, its contents untouched, into the fridge.

"Didn't you eat lunch today?" Her mom questioned.

"Yeah...somebody in my home room shared their lunch with me."

"Like who?" Her mom immediately got that childish grin on her face.

"Really mom? I eat with the journalism girls all the time."

"Somehow I get the feeling this somebody wasn't one of the journalism girls," Her mother nudged her playfully.

"It wasn't," Rini was irritated at the heat collecting at her cheeks.

"Then, who was it?"

"A boy." Rini answered. "It was a boy, okay?"

♥

𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓'𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆
𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘢 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘶𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘞𝘏𝘈𝘔 𝘸𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘬𝘶𝘳𝘰𝘰'𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘣𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘤𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴? 𝘪𝘥𝘬 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘦...𝘱𝘭𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘥𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵, 𝘪𝘭𝘺! 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘺 200 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘳!

𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒗𝒐𝒕𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒂𝒅𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 𝒊𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒆𝒏𝒋𝒐𝒚𝒆𝒅! 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒐 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓!