𝐈 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃 - 𝖉𝖊𝖋𝖏 !

⺀𝟑

jacob can't remember the last time he was surrounded with someone like this. he already wasn't very popular with ben's bullying going on but he wasn't abnormally lonely, just a bit of an outcast.

the feeling was reborn and it felt better than ever. travis basically dragged him from class to class and once they had to split for one different class, he made sure to say goodbye instead of leaving jacob in the dust. he had swallowed his guilt for the whole day. he hasn't been left alone with his thoughts for six hours straight and frankly, that was the best thing.

jacob couldn't even pay attention when he was alone for the last class. every time he looked back down to scribble notes, in some unreadable yet chosen to be fancy hand writing, he couldn't help but remember how many times he smiled or the way travis just absolutely gushed about his dream career. even to a person he met only today, he was so friendly.

he would usually dread this class but,, so many things were different. he had real things to keep his head up and .. ben wasn't here anymore; to shove his head down or call him slurs behind his back.

.. would travis do that to him too? would he believe everything nasty kids say about him and his family? and would that change anything between them? so far, no one had even gone near them but he was alone now, his mind could be shook anytime and changed perspective on the stranger he thought he knew deeply already.

jacob knows he shouldn't get too attached. this'll probably only last a day and tomorrow, travis will avoid him like everyone else. they'll tell him what really happen if he spills enough. barber almost groaned with anxiety; he hadn't even told the truth the first time they met! he could feel spiritual grief just from the thought of travis figuring it all out. he was tried of everyone running away from him but he was also afraid of running away from people.

maybe that's why, in his nightmares, his legs throb uncontrollably and his lungs burn with every intake of breath.

he can't run anymore. it's punishing him.

god help me, he thought.

⺍̫⺍̫⺌̭

jacob took his usual route just to exit the school. he couldn't the eyes burning into the back of his head as he walked out of the main doors. everyone avoided a bubble around him like a boundary and no one would dare touch him. so instead, he escaped out of a back entrance and decided just to cut across the field down his street. he kept his head down, his earbuds dangled and bounced against his sweatshirt as he tried to decide the playlist to listen to all the way there.

with quickly deciding, he puts his final earbud in and the outside noise is cancelled instantly. jacob falls at peace, music was his only escape at this point. it made no sense for silence to ensure anymore; it gave him anxiety from spending too much in custody. no music, no birds chirping; he swore he was gonna go mad.

" 'cuse me, jacob? "

barber almost jumped out of his skin but saved himself from embarrassment by fumbling with his phone to hit stop on the song and pulled out his left earbud quite harshly. yet, his mood only lightened and his stomach fluttered realizing it was travis, " h - hey, travis. " he started, flashing an apologetic smile.

travis' face lifted almost instantly, knowing he had got jacob back down to earth. though his face squished and his lips puckered, " what're you looking at me like that for? " he teased, " nothing to be embarrassed about; music is just a way to lose yourself, huh? " russell smiles cheekily, leaning over jacob's shoulder to see his dim phone screen light up with the paused song;

good grief by bastille was all that showed up with the album cover in bold letters.

" maybe you should put together my next playlist. " travis shrugged, leaning off of jacob once and for all. despite his kind smile, he was devastated to find travis not as close anymore.

" heh,, no, i don't think i'd be any— "

" oh! i didn't even see a shortcut here! " travis stops in his tracks, holding onto the back of jacob's arm to show him. " why didn't you tell me! " he accused, a finger pointing to the sign with big, fancy letters. just seeing that park gave jacob the worst gut feeling. his face fell pale and he couldn't even move though he desperately tried to move them both away from there. he could still see the shrine set up for him. those long burned wax candles and wilting flowers all around a framed picture of his face. it was disgusting.

" we — we shouldn't, travis. it's - it's longer than you think. " jacob muttered, his jaw clenched tight as he tried and tried to put his eyes away from the blurry sight. the worst cold sweat ran down his back and he's never felt more nauseous in his entire life.

" oh come on, stop playing with me, dude. it'd be nice too! i haven't seen this whole place, ya know. imagine all the thing i could tell about to my parents. " jacob knew travis was only being sincere. they were new to the area and haven't seen the place for itself but why did he sound so taunting? like he already knew and was waiting for jacob to crack.

jacob shook his head, pushing on at the way travis hand slowly fell from his sleeve. " i'm serious, travis. we're not walking down there. " he declared.

travis grew puzzled and ultimately offended at how weird jacob was being about this. it was just a park though? " i'm serious too. come on, stop being weird. " seeing at how jacob wouldn't give him, it was shown obviously by his head shakes and constant ' no's '. he even tried some kind of puppy-dog eyes, " come onn! i'll make it up to you if you want! i'll give you a private concert or,, " and he won't blabbering on about the topic, rubbing it in further under jacob's skin.

until he did crack. " first the last fucking time— we're not going there! end of fucking story. " he snapped at travis. he felt himself going insane with guilt, worry and anger. he needed to keep travis away from there,, but was the yelling really worth it? it looked like he really,, hurt his feelings.

it looked like his heart snapped in half— travis just thought they were being funny with each other but he guesses the true feelings had to come out one way or another. " fine. i get it. out the new kid, that's great. i don't need to go with you anyway. " his eyes narrowed. the glass of hurt being hidden well with such deep hues. " bye jacob. "

barber never thought a goodbye could sound so harsh before yet heartbreaking. jacob doesn't know why he stood there in shock for so long. he just let travis wander off to the house two doors down. how could he explain that? all that worrying over other people exposing him for nothing when the real threat was just him. his heart has never hurt more.

taking his last glance at the entrance of the trail, he could've sworn there was a figure just looking over the shrine he hadn't seen before. with such a nice physique, he could decide it was girl and the only redhead he's ever seen.

what would she have to do with ben?

— AUTHORS  NOTE
ew cringe and cliche ik but it was bound
to happen since i really think jacob is the
worst at controlling himself if he's angry😳 anyways kind of a filler i get it it'll get better,,
hopefully,,,
happy reading !! 🦦