Dear Depression,
Honestly, you suck. You really, really suck. You tear people apart and you ruin lives. So many people, good people arw destroyed by you and your cruel and wicked ways. You are agony. Not physical agony, but agony in the sense that you tore a huge chunk out of my heart, and left it to feel jagged, so I feel like I'll never enjoy life again. You destroyed all the good in me and you emptied me of all hope. You tore me apart and made me worthless in my own eyes. All the pain, all the things I was trying to forget, everything I had hidden inside of me, it all came out, replacing anything good with hurt, and anger, broken trust, and issues I wasn't ready to face. I couldn't find a way to escape it, and it got worse. I got sick of the pain. And eventually, I did find a way to escape it. Every wound you opened inside of me, I healed with a cut on the outside. Every time you dragged up ghosts from my past, every time you tortured me inside of myself, I tortured myself on the outside. But eventually it stopped being torture; it became normal. An 'I'm addicted to what you do to me' normal. I couldn't stop. "We accept the love we think we deserve." We also accept the pain we think we deserve. Everything I did to myself, all of the hurt I caused myself, I loved, because I thought I deserved it. I'm not comfortable without a mode of self-destruct. And you did this to me. You made this happen. You relished in me losing myself, and you enjoyed when I lost my mind. That ends now. I still hate myself, but you will never again have the satisfaction of seeing your reflections on my arms, on my thighs, and on my stomach. You took so much away from me, and now its time I take from you. Enjoy your sanity while you still have it.
yours truly,
revenge
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Back at The Loony Bin
RandomJust some things I wrote when I was in a psych hospital. Kinda lost myself, and that's where I ended up, just like everyone else who was there. I promise I'm not insane.
